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June 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my friend told me he had just robbed a bank and needed a place to hide. Thinking he was joking, I let him in so we could hang out. 15 minutes later, the cops storm into my apartment. Now I'm an accomplice in a crime I thought was a joke. FML

#20718656
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58327) - you deserved it (16091)

On 06/10/2013 at 11:23pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I went fishing with my dad. I figured, since we were out on the dock, I may as well get rid of my farmer's tan. I fell asleep in the sun and woke up to a fishing net draped over me. I now have a fishnet pattern down the front of my body. FML

#20730236
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39308) - you deserved it (11201)

On 06/16/2013 at 9:39pm - misc - by jhughes1997 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my co-worker thought it would be funny to tell her husband that she cheated on him with me. I'm scared to death and I don't dare to go out by myself. FML

#20754723
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39420) - you deserved it (4039)

On 06/29/2013 at 6:19pm - misc - by unluckydude - Colombia (Boyaca)

Today, my cats were making a ton of noise rolling around and fighting over their toys, and I yelled for them to knock it off. When they looked up at me, their "toy" ran away. Not a toy, but a real mouse. It's been 2 hours, and I still can't find it. FML

#20705382
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39990) - you deserved it (10778)

On 06/04/2013 at 12:28pm - animals - by drkate25 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was on the tram, when an elderly couple got on. I stood up to give them room to sit together, but as I stood up, the tram set off and I went flying, knocking the elderly gentleman over. FML

#20707500
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48949) - you deserved it (4065)

On 06/05/2013 at 1:02pm - misc - by Bookworm (woman) - United Kingdom

Today, my dad found the Father's Day present that I spent at least ten hours preparing and decorating. I'd expected him to be extremely happy about this lovely gift. His only reaction was to ask if he could exchange it for something else. FML

#20701502
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45190) - you deserved it (3652)

On 06/02/2013 at 3:45pm - kids - by I keep failing it all (woman) - Lithuania (Vilniaus Apskritis)

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am feeling freezing cold and soaking wet. It turns out that my dad had opened my window when I was sleeping, and rain water had been pouring in on me all night. My hair, face, pillow, blankets, alarm clock, and homework were all soaked as well. FML

#20722563
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46684) - you deserved it (3217)

On 06/12/2013 at 10:40pm - misc - by Anon - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I discovered the source of the vile stench in my room. My daughter had "saved" a bird from our cat and put it in a box under my bed, hoping to nurse it back to health. She forgot about it, leaving the corpse rotting in there for who knows how long. FML

#20737123
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45614) - you deserved it (3064)

On 06/20/2013 at 12:54pm - animals - by Anonymous (man) - Pakistan (Punjab)

Today, my demented asswipe of a lab partner thought it'd be funny to replace the birthday gift I bought for my girlfriend with the large intestine of a recently-dissected dog. My girlfriend nearly fainted when she opened the gift box, and accused me of planning the whole thing. FML

#20752461
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43219) - you deserved it (2957)

On 06/28/2013 at 1:34pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Nigeria (Lagos)

Today, on the drive to church, I got a nosebleed. Not so bad, until I sneezed and splattered myself and my fiancé with blood, snot, and eventually tears. FML

#20705510
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47270) - you deserved it (4312)

On 06/04/2013 at 1:53pm - love - by BloodyMarry (woman) - United States

Today, I thought I was home alone. Likewise, my visiting grandfather thought he was alone. You can imagine the mutual surprise when I caught him stealing money from my sister's bedroom. FML

#20743925
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45845) - you deserved it (2738)

On 06/24/2013 at 1:38am - money - by pumboc (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friend got dumped. I wanted to say, "You must be devastated", thinking, "That really sucks." I said, "You must really suck." FML

#20717146
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44106) - you deserved it (12802)

On 06/10/2013 at 7:22am - misc - by Oops (woman) - United States

Today, my boss threatened to fire me for showing up at work early. His reasoning is that it looks bad when his workers show up before dawn and work later than he does. He assigned me these hours specifically to accommodate one of our clients. FML

#20725768
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41514) - you deserved it (2773)

On 06/14/2013 at 3:29pm - work - by wtfwhyfml (woman) - United States



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