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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, some jackass in an Iron Man mask nailed me in the head with a quarter while I was helping other customers. Minimum wage isn't worth this crap. FML

#20696570
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41409) - you deserved it (3493)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend found a letter I'd written to myself for moral support while we were broken up, in which I explained why we would never work out. Apparently I made a convincing argument. FML

#20645173
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35979) - you deserved it (35313)

On 05/06/2013 at 10:24am - love - by Alone (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was dancing in the passenger seat of my car with my family when a cop pulled us over. He thought I was trying to flag him down for help. I guess I'm not as good of a dancer as I thought. FML

#20662599
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39252) - you deserved it (12539)

On 05/14/2013 at 7:32am - misc - by ktorih137 - Canada (Nova Scotia)

Today, I stepped out of the kitchen to yell at my kids for running in the house. I had just mopped the floor, and did not want them to fall. I fell while yelling and twisted my ankle. At least they know it's dangerous now. FML

#20667457
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40862) - you deserved it (9069)

On 05/16/2013 at 5:50pm - kids - by meepdaleap - United States (Virginia)

Today, it was my very last day teaching my dance class. After the class ended, the owner of the studio started clapping and told all my students to give me a hug. No one hugged me. No one. FML

#20691616
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43816) - you deserved it (5101)

On 05/28/2013 at 6:14pm - work - by funnygirl018 - United States

Today, while working as a lifeguard, a kid took a dump in the pool. When I told everyone to clear the pool so we could clean it, another kid promptly stared at me, stood at the shallow end right where I was standing, pulled down his trunks, and peed on my feet. FML

#20696326
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46201) - you deserved it (3063)

On 05/30/2013 at 10:35pm - work - by heyyoitsapotato - United States

Today, I confronted my boss to find out why I was denied a promotion that she promised to me. Her response? "You should know by now I'm a liar. Not my fault if you believe the things I say." FML

#20680205
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36751) - you deserved it (3353)

On 05/22/2013 at 5:48pm - work - by Snurkles McGee (man) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I have an upset stomach. Every other minute, it sounds like Chewbacca is screaming to get out. FML

#20675696
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35497) - you deserved it (4455)

On 05/20/2013 at 4:14pm - health - by pixkalexi - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, I found out that me having a boyfriend is an on-going family joke. FML

#20694663
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42892) - you deserved it (3787)

On 05/30/2013 at 1:37am - love - by I'm a joke? -

Today, my daughter posted a beautiful, touching status on my Facebook wall for Mother's Day. It wasn't so touching that she'd just copied and pasted the one I wrote for her grandmother and sent it back to me, unedited. FML

#20658557
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44554) - you deserved it (3988)

On 05/12/2013 at 1:21pm - love - by mothers (woman) - United States

Today, I found out I was named after the woman my dad used to stalk when he was in high school. FML

#20668592
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47273) - you deserved it (3021)

On 05/17/2013 at 5:25am - misc - by Jololol - United States

Today, I took a nap, and I had a dream that my ex-girlfriend got back together with me. I woke up in a great mood. When I went back to bed, I dreamed that she broke up with me, again. FML

#20670246
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43688) - you deserved it (5709)

On 05/18/2013 at 1:22am - love - by Sarsippius -

Today, my 6-year-old daughter walked into the bathroom where I was grumbling about my weight. Seeing how upset I was, she took my hand and said, "Mom, you're not fat. You just look fat." FML

#20643910
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47789) - you deserved it (6362)

On 05/05/2013 at 8:56pm - kids - by me - United States (Texas)



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