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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was at my nursing internship. After helping a patient get into bed, I began to walk out of the room when I heard him say to another nurse, "Now that was a king sized lady". To make things even better, she didn't understand him the first time and I got to hear him say it again. FML

Today, my friend told me she'd lost her notebook filled with crucial notes for our finals. She asked if she could borrow mine and copy my notes. She then lost my notebook too. FML

#20669510
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40636) - you deserved it (10202)

On 05/17/2013 at 6:28pm - misc - by well great. - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my parents scoured my browser history, certain that I have a hidden Facebook account that I'm using to get up to no good. Their reasoning was that there's no way my only friends are my relatives and that all I can post about is about the weather. FML

#20655587
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37349) - you deserved it (6511)

On 05/11/2013 at 1:15am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I finally got a phone call from a publisher saying they would publish the book I'd written. I'd gotten loads of rejection letters, so I was so excited. Until I realized it was my dad, feeling sorry for me. FML

#20646182
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40838) - you deserved it (3151)

On 05/06/2013 at 7:43pm - work - by sobasics - United States

Today, I was told I would not be getting the job I was offered because I failed my drug test. They never gave me a drug test. FML

#20660591
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46296) - you deserved it (2642)

On 05/13/2013 at 10:39am - work - by Confused (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, working at a fast food restaurant, I was cleaning dishes in the back. I started to sing to myself. During the chorus I heard the echo of my voice in my ear. My boss had pushed the talk button on my headset so every staff member and everyone in the lobby could hear me over the intercom. FML

#20653580
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41802) - you deserved it (8534)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:44am - work - by legit247 - United States (Missouri)

Today, the vet sent me an email wishing my kitten a happy 2nd birthday. My cat died last year. FML

#20686886
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41206) - you deserved it (3396)

On 05/26/2013 at 4:33am - animals - by Tiber46 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I locked my keys in my car. Good thing I went to Lowe's to make spares, which are also now locked in the car. FML

#20684843
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34196) - you deserved it (16398)

On 05/25/2013 at 12:50am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New Jersey)

Today, after being nearly homeless and couch-hopping for the last few months, I finally signed a 1-year lease. When I got home, I was surprised to see a picture of my new complex on the front page of the newspaper. It turns out that they are fighting a serious bedbug infestation. FML

#20633909
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39432) - you deserved it (3164)

On 04/30/2013 at 10:50pm - misc - by creepycrawley247 (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I had to go buy diaper rash cream. For myself. FML

#20634292
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33599) - you deserved it (6685)

On 05/01/2013 at 2:40am - health - by ChangMu - United States (Iowa)

Today, I received a notice that if I don't move the abandoned vehicle from outside my house it will be repossessed at my expense. My car isn't abandoned. FML

#20662395
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35110) - you deserved it (3282)

On 05/14/2013 at 1:29am - misc - by CrappyCar (woman) - United States

Today, my brother broke his mountain bike, so he stole mine, and managed to break it as well. Then he made some kind of franken-bike out of parts from both, and messed that one up too. FML

#20673285
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38884) - you deserved it (3198)

On 05/19/2013 at 3:56pm - misc - by jfc, how just how (man) - United Kingdom (Milton Keynes)

Today, some jackass in an Iron Man mask nailed me in the head with a quarter while I was helping other customers. Minimum wage isn't worth this crap. FML

#20696570
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35822) - you deserved it (2835)

On 05/31/2013 at 12:05am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)



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