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May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, after spending a week defending my marriage to everyone, I found out my husband has an addiction I never knew about. Hookers. FML

#20646861
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (56528) - you deserved it (6484)

On 05/06/2013 at 11:27pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I was singing horribly in the shower. Without me knowing, my sister recorded my singing and set it as my ringtone. My phone rang in class and everyone heard it. My new nickname is American Idol. FML

#20649622
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47685) - you deserved it (10044)

On 05/08/2013 at 10:00am - kids - by kprince - United States (California)

Today, I started the bleaching treatments that my dentist recommended. Now, my two front teeth have ultra white spots, the rest of my teeth are still yellow and the roof of my mouth is burned. FML

#20653345
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40471) - you deserved it (7983)

On 05/09/2013 at 11:11pm - health - by ZydecosGirl - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was sitting next to an attractive man. Much to my surprise, he started stroking his foot against mine. I was happy at the flirting because I've been attracted to him forever, so I played along. That's when he stood up and explained he was trying to stretch out a cramp. FML

#20664979
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53007) - you deserved it (10404)

On 05/15/2013 at 12:54pm - intimacy - by Redfaced (woman) - United Kingdom (Walsall)

Today, walking by myself, I was caught up in a group of people that got arrested, and we all got fined for creating a public disturbance. When I explained I wasn't with them, the group backed me up. The police thought I was the ringleader, and now I have to go to court. FML

#20639737
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58971) - you deserved it (3400)

On 05/03/2013 at 9:14pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Netherlands

Today, while on my way to an important interview, I was stopped and ticketed for speeding. The ticket made me 20 minutes late, but when I showed up, I was told they forgot to call and let me know that the woman I was supposed to meet with called in sick this morning. FML

Today, while walking home with my boyfriend, he jokingly slapped my butt. A man as old as my dad drove by, yelled "Wooo, spank that ass! DAMN!" and kept leering at me before finally driving off. FML

#20668938
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40920) - you deserved it (5093)

On 05/17/2013 at 12:16pm - misc - by jessinono (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that my cell phone bill was much higher than normal. After investigating, I realized that a text conversation I had with my stalker, telling him multiple times not to contact me anymore, was to an international cell phone. I have to pay to be stalked. FML

#20666438
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44850) - you deserved it (5820)

On 05/16/2013 at 12:31am - money - by astalkerindeed (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I decided to end things with my boyfriend, thinking it would be fine since things have never been at all serious between us. He cried for hours before having his grandmother text me to say how heartless I am. FML

#20654207
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41946) - you deserved it (7850)

On 05/10/2013 at 12:48pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway

Today, I got a mosquito bite inside my cast. I slipped a ruler into it and started scratching to relieve the itch. Part of the ruler ended up snapping off inside. FML

#20669324
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41773) - you deserved it (14364)

On 05/17/2013 at 4:49pm - health - by sprainedankle - Saudi Arabia (Ar Riyad)

Today, my girlfriend dumped me because she apparently saw me making out with her sister. She doesn't even have a sister. FML

#20671163
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49669) - you deserved it (4227)

On 05/18/2013 at 3:34pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I discovered that the "dish soap" my sister uses to clean our dishes when it's her turn, is actually a semi-toxic floor cleaner. FML

#20661400
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37868) - you deserved it (2610)

On 05/13/2013 at 7:05pm - misc - by emmingle - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, I found out I have something in common with three other girls. We all have the same boyfriend. FML

#20655447
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (58072) - you deserved it (5258)

On 05/11/2013 at 12:01am - love - by Bridget - Canada (Ontario)



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