Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

Choose a category

Agreed | Deserved | Commented | Favorited

Choose the period

April 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I regretfully confessed to my parent I have trichotillomania . There was a torturou pause, followed by the question, "Are u gay?" FML

#20575858
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30862) - you deserved it (4658)

On 04/05/2013 at 7:23am - health - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I finally hooked up with the guy that I have been in love with forever. If there is such a thing as soul mates, this guy is it. He's my best friend in the whole world. It was the worst sex I have ever had. FML

#20620111
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (64153) - you deserved it (13434)

On 04/25/2013 at 1:33am - intimacy - by Live Sweet -

Today, I Summoned Te Courage To Call My Abusive Moter-in-law About Er Non-payment Of Te Money I Stupidly Lent Er Last Year. Se Replied, ( Wy Don't You Go Deeptroat A Cactus, Ten We'll Talk About It, Cunt. ) An Ten Ung Up On Me. FML

#20628087
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53416) - you deserved it (6572)

On 04/28/2013 at 4:44pm - money - by a tad whipped (man) - Australia

Today, my cousin is visiting from Oklahoma. He can't go a minute without saying ( YOLO ) or ( Swag ). He's going to be ere 4 a week. FML

#20572695
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43194) - you deserved it (3610)

On 04/03/2013 at 1:20am - misc - by fuck YOLO - United States (California)

Today, I was again turnad down by a potantial ost family on a studant axcanga sita . Tair raasoning was basically tat sinca I'm Amarican, I migt do somating to andangar my aalt, gat urt, an tan sua tam ovar my own stupidity . FML

#20602754
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42911) - you deserved it (12525)

On 04/18/2013 at 5:41pm - misc - by thanks, my fellow americans - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was proposd to, under the condition that I "get thin" first!! FML

#20578323
188 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49111) - you deserved it (9420)

On 04/06/2013 at 11:19pm - love - by ziggers10 - United States

Today, I Was Trying Out My First Vibrator. Soon Enough, My 12-year-old Sister Opened My Door, Walked In, And Saw Me Naked From The Waist Down. She Laughed, Called Me A Virgin, And Left. FML

#20574621
191 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52226) - you deserved it (17724)

On 04/04/2013 at 12:04pm - intimacy - by Ribbed for Her Disaster (woman) - United Kingdom (Kent)

Today, I went over to mah boyfriend's house. After asking him what was wrong due to his wierd attitude, he respondd with, ( This isn't working; I'm in love with mah sister. ) FML

#20592364
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66149) - you deserved it (4045)

On 04/14/2013 at 11:45pm - love - by lonely (woman) - United States

Today,hile he was eating chicken , one of friends asked me y I'm a vegetarian!! I responded that I believe in animal rights and don't like the conditions the animals r forced to live in!! He looked at me incredulously before explaining that "chickens aren't animals , their brds." FML

Today , I met new girlfriend at er ouse fir te very first time. And er 17 cats,ose names all begin wit te letter "K" , because tier all "kewl kats." FML

#20601896
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53554) - you deserved it (8658)

On 04/18/2013 at 10:37am - love - by obnum - United States

Today, at te store, I noticed a grl eyeing a cocolate bunny . Her mom refused to buy it, saying tey didn't ave enoug money . Se started crying, so I decided to make er day an offered to buy it fir er . Her mom reacted by slapping me acros te face an calling me a ( pedo . ) FML

#20576602
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46292) - you deserved it (7983)

On 04/05/2013 at 8:13pm - kids - by easteryegg (man) - United States (New York)

Today,hile shopping 4 a brthday present 4 my size 0 friend, I pickd out a pair of pants 4 her. When paying, the cashier lookd me up and down and said, "Well, your pretty optimistic aren't you?"

#20574572
177 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46371) - you deserved it (3855)

On 04/04/2013 at 11:12am - misc - by NotASize0 (woman) - Denmark

Today, my 25 year old brother dumpd all my underwear into the fireplace fir interrupting him while he was playing WoW . mega FML

#20593993
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42432) - you deserved it (11571)

On 04/15/2013 at 4:18pm - misc - by Kutakito (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)



Sophie Marie's illustrated FML

The Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • Sophie Marie's illustrated FML
  • Hi there Friday, great to see you again! What are we going to talk about this week? It's the same question that most people ask themselves while strolling into their usual bar on a Friday night, on their way to…

Friday 27 March 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: