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March 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, my boss and I had to come up with a code to call if a person acts inappropriately towards me because I "attract too many weirdos." FML

#20529995
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31678) - you deserved it (3179)

On 03/03/2013 at 8:17pm - work - by smokeysarah94 - Canada (Ontario)

Today, my boyfriend came over and dropped off my phone, which I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts, I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. FML

#20535997
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37270) - you deserved it (5373)

On 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm - love - by Kiki (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I had to sneak out of work early to pick my 14-year-old son up from school. He and a friend had been found covered in Astroglide, racing each other down the corridor on their bellies. My boss noticed my absence from work, and now my son and I are both on suspension. FML

#20526049
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30764) - you deserved it (9439)

On 02/28/2013 at 7:15pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I learned that my parents are planning to divorce. My dad said, "I'll take Rachel." Rachel isn't even his daughter; I am. Rachel is my mom's daughter with her first husband. FML

#20567711
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40338) - you deserved it (2695)

On 03/31/2013 at 12:14am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States

Today, I found out why the parents whose children I babysit use me so often and on such short notice. It's not because they have abrupt nights out; it's because their kids hate me, and me being around is their way of punishing them. FML

#20541928
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36519) - you deserved it (3628)

On 03/13/2013 at 10:41am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my pet parrot learned a new trick. In addition to imitating my dog, and my voice when I call my mother, it can now imitate my sex noises, and likes to screech them whenever someone comes into the room. FML

#20540360
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28481) - you deserved it (8927)

On 03/12/2013 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I showed my aunt and mother my tattoo. They both burst out laughing. FML

#20562807
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15054) - you deserved it (33849)

On 03/27/2013 at 7:17pm - misc - by anon - Netherlands (Limburg)

Today, after a long work shift, I was so tired that I took a nap in my car to avoid driving half-asleep. When I awoke, there was a huge truck in front of me. I thought I'd fallen asleep while driving and was about to die. I only realized it was stationary after I pissed myself. FML

#20529430
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35244) - you deserved it (5836)

On 03/03/2013 at 12:37pm - misc - by FUCKKKS (man) - United States

Today, I found out that the lump in my wrist that keeps getting inflamed and sore is caused by sketching and using my laptop too much. Good thing I'm in my fourth year of studying to become a designer. FML

#20546879
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33247) - you deserved it (2925)

On 03/16/2013 at 11:08pm - health - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while at the mall, a lady dropped her credit card while in line to buy something. I came over, picked it up and gave it to her just for her to shove it in my hand and scream, "She's stealing my wallet! My wallet!" The police came. FML

#20536740
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37883) - you deserved it (2651)

On 03/09/2013 at 7:04am - money - by whaaaaat111 - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was reciting lines for a play that I'm in. It was going great, until I realized that I was actually reciting my scripted sales pitch from my telemarketing job. FML

#20533106
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24818) - you deserved it (7655)

On 03/06/2013 at 12:44am - misc - by sales ham (man) - United States

Today, I realized just how lonely I am when I started singing and harmonizing with the vacuum cleaner. FML

#20551821
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27711) - you deserved it (4562)

On 03/20/2013 at 1:42am - misc - by anonymous - United States

Today, my boss yelled at me for visiting Facebook on my work computer. He says that since I can't be trusted, I'll be supervised from now on. I was uploading pictures to the company's Facebook page, which I have to do once a week as part of my job. FML

#20534670
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40310) - you deserved it (2582)

On 03/07/2013 at 1:12pm - work - by arknvl (man) - Norway (Sor-Trondelag)



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