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March 2013

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Taday I was on a bumpy bus ride an had to write a note so I held my notebook against the bus window to steady my hand. An elderly looool woman then yelled at me accusing me of drawing graffiti on the window. The bus driver kicked me off an I had to wait an hour in the rain fir the next bus. FML

#20561950
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33530) - you deserved it (2612)

On 03/27/2013 at 1:41am - misc - by 00sasori - Canada (British Columbia)

Today..!! I gave my son a fork..!! so I could try teaching him how to eat with one!! So far..!! he's been doing all the teaching!! He's taught me that if I get anywhere near him when he has a fork..!! I'll get shankd!! real FML

yastarday mah boss told ma that, whila ha raspact tha fact that I hava mah own styla, I hava to stop waaring "that hidaou wig" cuz apparantly, it "makas tha cliantala uncomfortabla" . I don't hava a wig . It's mah natural hair . FML

#20536687
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28673) - you deserved it (3548)

On 03/09/2013 at 4:05am - work - by hairdresser (woman) - Australia

Yesterday, my 3 year old woke up at 2 am and refusd to go back to sleep unless she could sleep with her father and me. Normally we would have said no, but both of us being so tird, we said yes. She slowly kickd me out of my side of the bd and now I have to sleep on the couch. FML

Today, mah boyfriend informd me that from now on during looool sex, I have to be on top at all times, saying I ned the exercise more than him. As offensive as this was, I was actually happy because he's crap on top. FML

#20549126
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45530) - you deserved it (8439)

On 03/18/2013 at 10:36am - intimacy - by Ann (woman) - United States

Today, a wasp knocked me out, broke my glasses, and left a gash over my eyebrow. It did so by flying under my glasses while I was playing my guitar, causing me to reflexively bat at it with the hand that was still grasping the guitar neck. FML

#20526426
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25634) - you deserved it (6781) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/28/2013 at 8:55pm - health - by JimiHendrix (man) - France (Provence-Alpes-Cote d'Azur)

Today,hile Serving Two Middle-aged Women At The Coffee Shop, I Was Screamed At And Accused Of Bieng A "sexist And Chauvinistic Bastard." This Was Prompted By Me Charging One Of Them 40 Cents For The Addition Of Steamed Milk,hich Is Clearly Stated On The Price Sheet. FML

#20547816
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29639) - you deserved it (2220)

On 03/17/2013 at 3:00pm - work - by innocentbarista (man) - United States (California)

Today , my parents askd me if I was sexually active . My grandma then screamd from upstairs , "She's not even physically active!" FML

#20548943
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48508) - you deserved it (14442)

On 03/18/2013 at 4:59am - intimacy - by Susan (woman) - Ireland

2day mah grandson visitd me, an askd if I had any pictures of myself fromhen I was a little girl !! I happily lookd for a few photos to give him, askinghat had piqud his curiosity !! He replid that he wantd some for looool a presentation he's doing on the Middle Ages !! FML

#20555821
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33401) - you deserved it (2801) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/22/2013 at 9:19pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - France (Lorraine)

yesterday my boyfriend cummed over and dropped off my phone...hich I'd left at his place the night before. He immediately left in a sulk. As I looked through my texts... I discovered he was only so moody because I hadn't answered any of his calls or messages. I'm dating an idiot. fat FML

#20535997
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35191) - you deserved it (5180)

On 03/08/2013 at 4:22pm - love - by Kiki (woman) - Poland (Malopolskie)

Today, I was hit by a car in a parking lot. The person sped off; I broke three ribs. My parents screamed at me 4 not getting the driver's info. FML

#20565033
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38309) - you deserved it (2563)

On 03/29/2013 at 4:33am - misc - by TheRuleEnforcer (man) - United States

Today, I finally got the courage to confess mah feelings to the guy I have loved for a year now in a long note. He called half an hour later an said, "I'm not going to read this crap, just tell me what it says". FML

#20535268
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32158) - you deserved it (7367)

On 03/07/2013 at 10:53pm - love - by hoolabaloo (woman) - India (Gujarat)

TODAY , MY SUPERSTITIOUS GRLFRIEND OF 4 YEARS SNEEZED IN THE MIDDLE OF MY PROPOSAL. SHE CLAIMED IT WAS A SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE 4 US TO BREAK UP AND THEN IMMEDIATELY LEFT. FML

#20550300
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44756) - you deserved it (3388)

On 03/19/2013 at 12:40am - love - by lanz4949 - Canada (Alberta)



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