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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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February 2012

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I took my girlfriend out for a fancy dinner to celebrate our anniversary. When the waitress came, we instantly recognized each other. She was the girl I'd had a one night stand with a few weeks before. FML

#19066381 (386)

I agree, your life sucks (975) - you deserved it (15719)

On 02/13/2012 at 4:49pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Canada

Today, my girlfriend openly mocked me, calling me an idiot for thinking seahorses are real. She insists that they're like unicorns, and only exist in fiction. FML

#19011478 (382)

I agree, your life sucks (9749) - you deserved it (1127)

On 02/06/2012 at 4:52pm - animals - by BoringFucker (man) - United Kingdom (Lancashire)

Today, I had a debate with my girlfriend about whether giving birth or getting kicked in the balls hurts more. It ended up with her kicking me in the balls. I was the one who said giving birth hurt more. FML

#19053808 (272)

I agree, your life sucks (6673) - you deserved it (1291)

On 02/12/2012 at 1:17am - love - by OwMyBalls (man) -

Today, I was having lunch at McDonald's when I dropped a French fry down my shirt. It stuck out the top of my bra. Before I had the chance to remove it, a creepy man picked it out and ate it saying that it was the best French fry he had ever eaten. FML

#19000148 (288)

I agree, your life sucks (11173) - you deserved it (1103)

On 02/05/2012 at 10:45am - misc - by Anonymous - Reserved

Today, it appears that it's Single Loser Awareness Day. FML

#19073057 (263)

I agree, your life sucks (2645) - you deserved it (693)

On 02/14/2012 at 10:32am - love - by crazytown62 - United States

Today, even though she can barely deal with raising kids, my 19-year-old sister announced her fourth pregnancy, by a fourth man, of yet another race. Why? Because she wants to "be like Angelina Jolie." I fear that social services may laugh at me if I tell them. FML

#19059341 (262)

I agree, your life sucks (7014) - you deserved it (444)

On 02/12/2012 at 7:18pm - kids - by amythest - United Kingdom (Belfast)

Today, my boyfriend confessed to me that he purposely makes me angry, because when I'm angry, I clean, and it saves him having to do it himself. FML

#18977119 (258)

I agree, your life sucks (8024) - you deserved it (1474)

On 02/02/2012 at 3:56pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Reading)

Today, I received a single, handmade valentines card from the weirdest kid in the school. It said, "If you ever get mauled by a bear, I hope he doesn't damage your face." FML

#18988741 (252)

I agree, your life sucks (6863) - you deserved it (1461)

On 02/04/2012 at 12:12am - love - by Jayde - United States (Texas)

Today, I took off my sweatshirt in the middle of class. The tanktop I was wearing underneath went with it. FML

#18980998 (251)

I agree, your life sucks (8116) - you deserved it (2013)

On 02/02/2012 at 11:23pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (California)

Today, I woke up to one of my hamsters cannibalizing the other. FML

#18984075 (250)

I agree, your life sucks (9586) - you deserved it (1137)

On 02/03/2012 at 1:29pm - animals - by deadhamster - United States

Today, my mom was freaking out about me handling a CD-ROM with my bare hands. When I asked her what all the commotion was about, she said she was worried that I would catch "one of those computer viruses" she'd heard about on the news. FML

#18974920 (249)

I agree, your life sucks (26745) - you deserved it (1456)

On 02/02/2012 at 6:32am - misc - by aliezzedine (man) - Lebanon

Today, my social anxiety got so bad, I nearly had a panic attack when too many people joined my World of Warcraft party. FML

#19033739 (248)

I agree, your life sucks (124) - you deserved it (3334)

On 02/09/2012 at 11:42am - health - by SocialAnxietyNightmare (woman) - United Kingdom (London)

Today, I was on a date with a guy I've been crushing on. In the middle of the dinner, he said he had to go get something from his car. When I asked what it was, he smiled and said it was a surprise. I waited for my surprise for half an hour. Then I decided to pay the bill and go home and cry. FML

#18976256 (245)

I agree, your life sucks (14439) - you deserved it (795)

On 02/02/2012 at 1:00pm - love - by kingpig (woman) - Sweden (Skane Lan)