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Thursday 9 May 2013

Top of the day | Top of the week | Top of the month | All time

Today, I was questioned by police for forcing a 12-year-old to get in my car. That 12-year-old is my daughter, who refused to get in until I agree to buy her a highly expensive purse just to become popular. FML

#20653026
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52714) - you deserved it (6673)

On 05/09/2013 at 9:41pm - kids - by brokedad - United States

Today, by pure chance, I found the website where my boyfriend has been getting all the cute, "original" romantic texts he sends me, including the one that made me fall in love with him to begin with. FML

#20651954
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44945) - you deserved it (9282)

On 05/09/2013 at 12:30pm - love - by Anonymous - Saudi Arabia (Makkah)

Today, as with every day, I had to endure my roommate talking to his wife in a baby voice. This is a grown man, who has had a beard since junior high, who literally talks to her like you would a puppy or a baby. Someone kill me. FML

Today, my ex-wife, whom I divorced just 8 months ago, asked me to attend her wedding, because "it would mean a lot" to her. She's marrying the man she cheated on me with. FML

#20651917
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48364) - you deserved it (2870)

On 05/09/2013 at 12:01pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, while answering an "anonymous" survey about how to keep my school drug free, I told them they should stop drug testing the kids that they know don't do drugs and test the sketchier ones. They in turn drug tested me. FML

#20652571
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38074) - you deserved it (13543)

On 05/09/2013 at 6:22pm - misc - by drug testing - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend bought me a silver necklace. I have a silver allergy, but I thanked him anyway and encouraged him to return it. I found out later that he knew about my allergy all along and bought it on purpose so he could return it, get a refund, and still look good. FML

#20652174
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57216) - you deserved it (4558)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:12pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Norway (Oslo)

Today, I had my college graduation ceremony. As I was walking across the stage, some asshat, in front of over 55,000 students and staff, brazenly ran across the stage, snatched my diploma up out of the president's hand, and ran off. FML

#20651616
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (55718) - you deserved it (3825)

On 05/09/2013 at 6:11am - misc - by Uwrongfodat (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally got the courage to make a move on the guy I've been crushing on. I asked him if he would like to go see a movie with me. He answered, "Sorry, I've already seen it." I didn't even mention any particular movie. FML

#20651541
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52206) - you deserved it (3850)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:01am - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, I went to therapy. I started talking about my childhood and my life. By the time the session was over my therapist was crying. FML

#20651461
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (59959) - you deserved it (3820)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:30am - health - by Screwed Up (man) - United States

Today, I was laid off from my job as a manager. After cleaning out my office, I began clearing my computer. I received an email from HR announcing a job position that opened up. Too bad it was for my job. FML

#20651556
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42166) - you deserved it (3356)

On 05/09/2013 at 3:35am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, the woman I babysat for blamed me for the cut on her son's face, and fired me with no pay for not looking after him properly. He already had the cut when I arrived. FML

#20652046
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46189) - you deserved it (2745)

On 05/09/2013 at 1:44pm - kids - by rachelllynne - United Kingdom (Manchester)

Today, I started the bleaching treatments that my dentist recommended. Now, my two front teeth have ultra white spots, the rest of my teeth are still yellow and the roof of my mouth is burned. FML

#20653345
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39987) - you deserved it (7912)

On 05/09/2013 at 11:11pm - health - by ZydecosGirl - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I was rushed to the ER due to a very swollen foot and high fever. The doctors said I just have a tissue infection but my parents believe I have a flesh eating disease. I can hear them discussing my future with an amputated leg. FML

#20652691
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42230) - you deserved it (2260)

On 05/09/2013 at 7:18pm - health - by iLikeMyLegs - Canada (Ontario)



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