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FML with : he could

Number of results : 479

Today, it's been three months since my sister broke her car, meaning she couldn't get to work, and I've giving her money every month so she could buy food and so on. I just found out that her workplace is less than 200 metres from where she lives. FML

#21381106
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23810) - you deserved it (3750)

On 03/25/2015 at 1:42am - love - by Julie - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, I had to bail my drunk dad out of jail after he beat the shit out of a mime artist. All he had to say on the matter was "Fucking bastard was playing mind games." and that he'd beat him up again if he could. FML

#21378507
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26400) - you deserved it (2034)

On 03/20/2015 at 5:23pm - misc - by ~__~ -

Today, I had to work a double shift after my relief called in "sick" just so he could go to a party. FML

#21377747
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27120) - you deserved it (2198)

On 03/19/2015 at 12:41pm - work - by SleepIsForTheWeak (woman) - Canada (Newfoundland)

Today, I told my mom I've been having sleep issues and asked if she could take me to the doctor. She decided I just need to read the Bible more. Needless to say, I still can't sleep. FML

#21377689
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26698) - you deserved it (2153)

On 03/19/2015 at 10:24am - health - by david99021 (man) - Turkey (Ankara)

Today, my ex called me up to suggest that we become friends, only so that she could introduce me to her new boyfriend. FML

#21375599
68 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28904) - you deserved it (3128)

On 03/16/2015 at 10:36am - love - by xswitch74 (man) - United Kingdom

Today, an old friend of mine landed in Spain, where he's visiting me. After a few minutes talking about where we should meet, we realized the reason he couldn't figure out where it was, was probably due to the fact that he was in Barcelona. I live in Madrid. FML

#21371100
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30609) - you deserved it (3722)

On 03/09/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Spain (Aragon)

Today, my son was at a birthday party. After eating a plate of cake, he loudly asked the birthday boy's mum if he could have sloppy seconds. I don't know where he heard that phrase, but the other kids' parents shot me very dirty looks. FML

#21369892
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27087) - you deserved it (2712)

On 03/07/2015 at 11:59am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I slipped on some ice and wrecked my back. When my husband and I went to go to bed, he begged me to take one of the pain pills left over from his recent surgery. Not so I could feel better and get some rest, but so he could have sex. FML

#21365511
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29949) - you deserved it (3070)

On 02/28/2015 at 9:47pm - intimacy - by k8thagr8 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I went through the nightmare of having to go to my doctor so he could remove a living spider from my nasal cavity. FML

#21365080
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35494) - you deserved it (2263)

On 02/28/2015 at 4:04am - health - by Anonymous - Australia

Today, as I was about to have sex with my husband, I said I wanted to "spice things up." Apparently, our ideas weren't the same. He yanked my nipples as hard as he could and said, "Yeah, you like that?" FML

#21364342
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29818) - you deserved it (5365)

On 02/27/2015 at 12:28am - intimacy - by milked (woman) - United States

Today, I worked my boyfriend's shift so he could stay home. I even brought him the free meal I got for helping out. Turns out he wanted to stay home so badly to cheat on me. FML

#21362681
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36768) - you deserved it (2563)

On 02/24/2015 at 4:07pm - intimacy - by xxruby - United States (Texas)

Today, after a week of not seeing each other, my boyfriend asked if he could come over and hang out. He only came because he ran out of food at his house. FML

#21355470
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29003) - you deserved it (2964)

On 02/13/2015 at 5:49pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my thundercunt of a neighbor, who's hated me since I moved in, called the cops on me. He told them he saw me shooting up on drugs. I'm diabetic and was injecting insulin, which he could only have seen by spying on me through my living room window. FML

#21355411
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33722) - you deserved it (1836)

On 02/13/2015 at 3:24pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) -

Today, my "best friend" stole almost $1,000 worth of electronics and video games from my roommates and me, just so he could pawn them off and buy himself a new car stereo. FML

#21355305
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30235) - you deserved it (2632)

On 02/13/2015 at 11:36am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, in the magazine section of a bookstore, an old dude asked me politely to grab something that he couldn't reach. I did so with a smile, touched by his "nice old guy" demeanour, only glancing at the item in question as I handed it to him. It was a porn mag. FML

#21350754
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26557) - you deserved it (3385) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/06/2015 at 12:18am - misc - by beurk - Sent from mobile version



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