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  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
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FML with : i reali

Number of results : 1073

Today, returning home from a party, I realised I'd forgotten my keys. My roommate was sleeping so soundly that after an hour of throwing gravel and ringing the doorbell, I had to give up and get a room at the hotel over the road. For €85 I had a view of my room. FML

#21345042
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19812) - you deserved it (4741) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/27/2015 at 6:45am - money - by LadyGrey -

Today, my dad and I were having a conversation about boneless chicken. He told me that they are raised boneless, going into detail, and I bought every word of it. Not until he started laughing did I realize how gullible I really am. I'm 22. FML

#21344889
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12899) - you deserved it (22547)

On 01/27/2015 at 12:43am - misc - by katrina2d (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. It wasn't until the huge fight which ended with us breaking up did I realize that I was snowed in with him. One day down, two to go. FML

#21344752
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21867) - you deserved it (3332)

On 01/26/2015 at 8:47pm - love - by sleeping on the floor - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized why you should never wear a thong under yoga pants that are a couple of sizes too small. It's a weird thing, seeing your co-workers anus. FML

#21344664
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21002) - you deserved it (2282)

On 01/26/2015 at 6:24pm - misc - by Anonymous - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML

#21343098
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28859) - you deserved it (3593)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by xoragebaby - United States

Today, I was riding my bike to work in a hurry and hit a pothole. I flew off and hit the ground hard. I was badly shaken, but an old lady came over, checked me out and helped me to my feet. After she left the scene, I realized she'd pickpocketed my wallet while "helping" me. FML

#21342099
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31470) - you deserved it (2640)

On 01/22/2015 at 4:02am - health - by shifala (man) - Philippines (Quezon City)

Today, I ran out of cash. The nearest ATM to my house is over a half hour away by foot. After walking all the way there under the blistering heat of the sun, I realized I'd left my card back at home. FML

#21339623
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18181) - you deserved it (19974)

On 01/18/2015 at 2:44pm - money - by saqmuel093 (man) - Malaysia (Sarawak)

Today, I told my dog to give me the stick he had in his mouth so I could throw it for him. After I picked it up I realized it was a dried-out piece of shit. FML

#21338477
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20745) - you deserved it (12165)

On 01/16/2015 at 7:37pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I realized that while I've been the same minuscule height for the past five years, my feet won't stop growing. I'm 5 foot and a size 12. I look like a clown. FML

#21338417
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27741) - you deserved it (5583)

On 01/16/2015 at 5:15pm - health - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, a pretty girl joined the line at the bus station. I let her skip the line and go before me so I could sit next to her. After she bought her ticket, I realized there were no more seats left on that bus. I was told to get off, and had to take the next bus, sitting next to a snoring old man. FML

#21338193
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25086) - you deserved it (11139)

On 01/16/2015 at 10:41am - love - by Marfo101 (man) - Ghana (Greater Accra)

Today, anticipating another stressful day of work, I went to leave my house with a cluster of thoughts in my mind. It was only when I heard my front door lock behind me, my hand still resting on the handle, that I realised I had forgotten my house keys. FML

#21332094
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24633) - you deserved it (3113)

On 01/06/2015 at 3:57pm - misc - by trixanne (woman) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my school textbook's back cover ripped off. Not wanting to have my teacher find out, I glued the cover back together. Only after the glue dried did I realize that I actually glued the back cover upside down. FML

Today, I realized that although I'm dating the most loveable, caring and genuine man, the fact that he's a crack addict means I'll never be his drug of choice when he needs a hit. FML

#21310760
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27449) - you deserved it (19339)

On 12/03/2014 at 1:34pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I realized my anger management has hit a new low when I screamed at a goose for being a goose. FML

#21309384
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27771) - you deserved it (7512)

On 12/01/2014 at 11:38am - misc - by WickedLittleDoll - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I realised I was far too attached to my duvet. Literally. I just got a large tattoo on my back, and my duvet somehow stuck to my skin during the night and formed part of the scab. I now have the joy of deciding whether to tear it off fast or peel it away slowly. FML

#21306764
65 comments


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