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FML with : chro

Number of results : 16

Today, after having my sinuses draining for a couple days, my ma stopped by for a surprise visit. Upon discovering the trash can full of used tissues, she called my pastor grandfather to talk to me about the chronic masturbation problem I don't have, but that everyone now thinks I have. FML

Today, I had to go to a big dinner with my insane relatives. Highlights of conversation included my sister telling us about the "country of Iowa", my dad accusing me of faking my chronic fatigue syndrome, and my grandpa claiming that Nelson Mandela is the Antichrist. FML

#20941414
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32046) - you deserved it (2774)

On 11/01/2013 at 2:38pm - misc - by FUCK ME, MAKE IT STOP (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, I walked in on my daughter hugging and sobbing into her Edward Cullen cut-out. She won't tell me what's wrong, yet she can confide in a creepy fictional stalker whose facial expression is locked to "chronically constipated". Where did I go wrong? FML

#20778274
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47021) - you deserved it (6874)

On 07/12/2013 at 7:18pm - kids - by So little trust. (woman) - Canada (Alberta)

Today, my guidance counselor told me that I'll have to join my school's special education needs sector. This is because I can't attend school properly due to chronic issues with severe pain. So much for my 3.9 GPA and being in the top 5% of my class. FML

#20632758
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (45737) - you deserved it (2953)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:55pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was admitted to the hospital for chronic constipation. I have to share a room with two other girls who are also having bowel problems. We're all on strong laxatives, and there's apparently only one bathroom in this place. FML

#20613283
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (47079) - you deserved it (3030)

On 04/22/2013 at 3:10pm - health - by shatMyself - United States

Today, I realized that my manager and I have synchronized menstrual cycles. She gets extremely bitchy, and I get extremely vulnerable and emotional - she yells at me and I burst into tears. FML

Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML

#20024660
502 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11351) - you deserved it (149563)

On 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my husband and I found out that our daughter's chronic stomach aches are due to gluten intolerance, so we need to cut all wheat out of our diet. We're bakers. FML

#19376505
192 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31266) - you deserved it (2617)

On 03/30/2012 at 2:28pm - kids - by MDWilde (woman) - United States (Alaska)

Today, when I excitedly announced to my mother-in-law that I was pregnant, she looked at me with a blank expression and asked me who the father was. She's 45. She's not senile or suffering from dementia, but apparently just suffering from being a chronic bitch. FML

#18834443
173 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33040) - you deserved it (3015)

On 01/17/2012 at 12:04pm - misc - by littlelottie - United States (Florida)

Today, my brother and I proposed to our girlfriends at the same time. We had perfect synchronization after practicing for days. My brother's girlfriend said yes, mine said no. FML

#18552373
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49199) - you deserved it (4817)

On 12/19/2011 at 10:40am - love - by emmmbo - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my parents grounded me and took away my phone, iPod and door. That's right, my door. They think that because I was stumbling and couldn't walk straight last night, I must have been out drinking. They know I suffer from chronic vertigo, but don't believe I was having an attack. FML

#16608434
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39273) - you deserved it (2832)

On 06/11/2011 at 9:06am - health - by sickbaby (woman) - Singapore

Today, after being chronically constipated for the better part of a week, I finally have the urge to poop. Too bad I'm 30 minutes early to work and locked out of the building. FML

#16496230
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29241) - you deserved it (3390)

On 06/04/2011 at 9:07am - health - by missbutthole - United States (New York)

Today, I woke up early and went to the dermatologist's, only to have them tell me that the skin condition I have that causes big, white spots to appear is chronic and I can do nothing about it. But they did give me cream for a different skin condition they found. FML

#13953523
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20175) - you deserved it (1958)

On 11/23/2010 at 8:40pm - health - by Username - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend thinks I'm too high maintenance because I have a chronic illness which requires frequent hospitalization. FML

#9059310
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28664) - you deserved it (2925)

On 03/13/2010 at 10:17pm - health - by bobby - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I was a TA watching the class take a test. I didn't realize that the projector was still on while I was searching the Internet. They watched me google "chronic itchy anus". FML

#6287129
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10288) - you deserved it (47802)

On 11/13/2009 at 12:47pm - health - by yellowjacket_34 (man) - United States (Montana)



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