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FML with : my wife and

Number of results : 68

Today, my wife and I were having sex when she suddenly stopped and said, "I just thought of a great lesson plan idea for my 3rd graders." This isn't the first time this has happened. FML

#21522820
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18345) - you deserved it (1805)

On 02/04/2016 at 5:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous -

Today, I work 732 miles away from my wife and three children, and I rarely get to go home. After giving up many hours of family time to work on my last home visit, I returned to work only to have my boss accuse me of stealing time, dock me 50 hours, and "review" my employment for termination. FML

#21515701
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21389) - you deserved it (1413)

On 01/15/2016 at 9:09pm - work - by I'm over it - United States

Today, my wife and I decided to celebrate Christmas Eve with her side of the family. When we arrived at her parents' house, I heard her mother say that Christmas miracles don't exist since my wife brought me along. FML

#21507294
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21454) - you deserved it (1474)

On 12/24/2015 at 12:34pm - love - by smyp - Lithuania

Today, a great job I have been wanting to apply for opened for applications. Turns out it requires a clean background with no credit issues. I recently got a notice saying my wife and I are being sued over an unpaid $140 medical bill that she neglected to pay. FML

#21497027
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22528) - you deserved it (1991)

On 11/26/2015 at 11:27am - money - by Adios Career - United States

Today, I thought my wife and I would reconcile after being separated for eight months. We ended up sleeping together after a dinner date, but she told told me afterwards that she still wanted a divorce. FML

#21473545
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24372) - you deserved it (2496)

On 09/27/2015 at 11:27pm - love - by anon - United States (Florida)

Today, my wife and I are about to move across the country when the landlord for our new house called and said a water line busted and flooded the house. The movers are coming tomorrow. FML

#21317549
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30275) - you deserved it (2040)

On 12/14/2014 at 9:07pm - misc - by BFons - United States (New Jersey)

Today, my wife and I drove two hours from our rural town to buy a new sofa. When we got home, it took us an hour to figure out there was no way to fit it through our door. We made the two hour drive back to return it, only to find the store was closed. FML

#21308507
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30584) - you deserved it (9399)

On 11/30/2014 at 1:09am - misc - by davy0540 - United States

Today, my wife and I decided to try out role playing. She ended up having an anxiety attack when I said she wasn't turning in her homework. FML

#21301827
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40301) - you deserved it (4725)

On 11/19/2014 at 12:27am - intimacy - by jigglypluff (man) - United States (Nebraska)

Today, my wife and I had an argument serious enough to end our marriage, while overseas on vacation, with my whole family present. Three more days of awkward tension until we get to fly home and it all ends. FML

#21298977
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34517) - you deserved it (3753)

On 11/14/2014 at 2:09pm - love - by overseasbummer - Ireland (Dublin)

Today, I'm on the last day of my honeymoon in Ireland. My wife and I have an amazing hotel room and a huge bed. She's passed out drunk and if I even touch her, she needs the bucket next to our bed. So much for finishing our week on a "fun" note. FML

#21267195
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32716) - you deserved it (6358)

On 09/28/2014 at 6:55pm - love - by superman21 - Ireland

Today, the day before my wife and I leave for our 1 year anniversary trip, I realized my passport expires in 2014, not 2015. Instead of a week's stay at an all-inclusive resort in the Dominican Republic, we'll be spending three days in Louisville. Three angry days in Louisville. FML

#21266059
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33249) - you deserved it (20123)

On 09/26/2014 at 10:23pm - love - by dumass - United States (Ohio)

Today, I called a company for a problem with our septic tank. Two workers show up, I take them into the garden to show them the manhole cover at the top of it. They open it up. We then gaze upon a sea of condoms floating on the surface. My wife and I don't use condoms. FML

#21073474
186 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57223) - you deserved it (4343) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 02/27/2014 at 7:32pm - love - by Maxime (man) - Sent from mobile version

Today, my mother-in-law called me every 2 hours, starting at 8pm and stopping at 10am the following morning. She says that since my wife and I are expecting our first child, I should "get used to waking up at all hours." She calls my work phone, which I'm not allowed to switch off. FML

Today, my wife and I were watching a football game. While someone was about to score, she started screaming, "Go!" and "Come on! You can do it! Go baby, go!" My first thought was that I wished I could still make her scream like that. FML

#21026614
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (57171) - you deserved it (12257)

On 01/13/2014 at 2:48pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my wife and I were watching Killing Kennedy. Jokingly, I said, "Spoiler alert: he dies." She threw a book at me and won't talk to me. I think she's serious. FML

#20953867
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48481) - you deserved it (7378)

On 11/11/2013 at 12:20pm - misc - by Thomas - United States (Virginia)



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