Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FML with : bra

Number of results : 775

Today, I finally found a bug I had been trying to get rid of. When I removed my bra, I noticed what looked like a piece of bug on it. Apparently, the bug was flattened and suffocated by my boob the entire day. FML

#21414219
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19620) - you deserved it (1967)

On 05/22/2015 at 10:26pm - misc - by Kurda (woman) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, I decided to get in shape for swimsuit season, so I went to the gym. I tried to lift a barbell up and over my head, which was fine, until I dropped it. Exercise earned me a concussion and a neck brace. FML

#21413444
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20501) - you deserved it (9210)

On 05/21/2015 at 8:22am - health - by crossfitter -

Today, I bought my first vibrator. I was really excited, until my crippling OCD kicked in, forcing me to turn it on and off seven times in rapid succession, causing it to give off a cracking sound and stop working. Now I'm sad. FML

#21412477
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25445) - you deserved it (9190)

On 05/19/2015 at 10:01am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, one of my idiot co-workers thought it'd be hilarious to "fix" my car while I was working. Now every time I step on the brake pedal, the horn goes off. FML

#21412007
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27181) - you deserved it (2265)

On 05/18/2015 at 2:41pm - work - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, after assuming I'd been scammed, I finally found the vibrator I ordered over 2 months ago. It was in my mom's bedside cabinet. FML

#21401155
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32692) - you deserved it (3580)

On 04/28/2015 at 12:58pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United Kingdom (Devon)

Today, it was my 18th birthday and I was told I couldn't get the night off work because a party of 34 had booked into the restaurant. It turned out my family had come in to 'celebrate' by making me wait on them. They were a nightmare, thought it was hilarious to be difficult, and didn't tip. FML

#21398382
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38332) - you deserved it (2403)

On 04/23/2015 at 8:28am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Dundee City)

Today, I was trying to make a good impression with my fiancé's friends. After a few hours, I thought all was going well. As I walked to the washroom, I heard, "So what disability does she have? No one can be like that without something wrong in their brain." FML

#21395050
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29288) - you deserved it (2411)

On 04/17/2015 at 2:24am - love - by apparently_disabled - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, for the first time in my life, a girl showed interest in me. She sent me a text message saying she wanted to come over and fuck my brains out. This would've made me the happiest guy alive, if only she weren't my extremely drunk sister. FML

#21391907
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33305) - you deserved it (2609)

On 04/11/2015 at 4:55pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I walked in on my 17-year-old brother jerking it to a scene from the movie Frozen. Brain bleach, please. FML

#21390007
172 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35594) - you deserved it (3659)

On 04/08/2015 at 1:19pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I found my first bra and tried it on. It still fits. FML

#21388113
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31387) - you deserved it (3279)

On 04/05/2015 at 3:18pm - misc - by Itsbeen8years (woman) - Slovakia (Bratislava)

Today, my mom let me know that I'll have to spend my entire tax return on replacing my car brakes. The reason I need new brakes is because almost every single time she uses the car, she floors the gas while the parking brake is still on. FML

Today, I was sitting in a library when a cute boy approached me, so I grabbed the nearest book. When he asked me what I was reading, I said I was revising for an English test. He laughed and pointed out that my book was in French. FML

#21384778
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15122) - you deserved it (18094)

On 03/31/2015 at 3:24pm - misc - by ip7 - United Kingdom (West Sussex)

Today, I got in an argument with an ex-girlfriend who kept tactlessly bragging to me about her new boyfriend. I told her to read what she'd sent me, then pretend her boyfriend was telling her that. Fifteen minutes later, her boyfriend calls me, yelling for making her feel sad. FML

#21384606
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29212) - you deserved it (3191)

On 03/31/2015 at 5:35am - love - by lucasbeck99 (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to teach my grandma how to burn files to CDs. I jokingly said that it doesn't involve literally burning the disks in fire, to which she responded by slapping me and calling me a patronizing brat. FML

#21383501
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23004) - you deserved it (12463)

On 03/29/2015 at 10:03am - misc - by shamwazzlefarznarfnarfwoofbaaa (man) - United States (New York)

Today, while getting ready for a job interview, I sneezed while brushing my teeth, splattering toothpaste everywhere and ruining my brand new dress. FML

#21382482
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26840) - you deserved it (4092)

On 03/27/2015 at 4:09pm - misc - by anon - United States (California)



FML's blog

  • JT's illustrated FML
  • Hello everybody, how's it going? This week we're looking at the delicate art of getting along with your neighbours. If you've ever lived in an apartment building, you'll know that having people live…

Friday 22 May 2015

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: