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FML with : fat

Number of results : 913

Today, a fifth grader gave me a note from his "father" excusing him from PE. It was riddled with spelling errors and shockingly poor grammar, so I rejected it as a blatant fake. Several hours later, I was informed by his very angry father that it wasn't actually fake. FML

#21460557
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24163) - you deserved it (3291)

On 08/25/2015 at 3:22pm - kids - by shit.jpg (man) - United States (Massachusetts)

Today, my psycho landlord threatened to take me to court if I don't pay my rent on time this month. I'd totally understand if he weren't my father-in-law, and if the reason I didn't pay on time before was because of hospital fees I'd incurred for an emergency appendectomy. FML

#21458301
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20653) - you deserved it (2113)

On 08/20/2015 at 12:16am - money - by Anonymous - United States (California)

Today, at a quiet restaurant, my stepdad loudly told me he hopes in the future they have "hover caskets" so he doesn't have to carry my "fat ass" to the grave. All because I didn't want a side salad. FML

Today, at my grandmother's funeral, my senile grandfather kept asking me "Where's granny? I've been looking for her, but I can't find her." FML

#21455960
143 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30882) - you deserved it (1371)

On 08/14/2015 at 11:08am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Denmark

Today, I was unloading Cokes outside of the movie theater I work at. While bent over, I heard someone call out, "Damn girl, you got a fat ass," followed by, "Oh God, that's a man!" I am indeed a man. FML

#21455147
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27501) - you deserved it (2399)

On 08/12/2015 at 9:50am - misc - by Why Me - United States (Washington)

Today, my 82-year-old great grandfather informed me that his "peeter" still works, and that most guys his age can't say the same. FML

#21454592
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21005) - you deserved it (1571)

On 08/11/2015 at 12:20am - intimacy - by yamaha_313 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a kid on a bike passed me and commented on my "big fat butt." Recognizing him from the neighborhood, I told my husband to go speak to his parents about the inappropriate comment. It turns out his father is the man who yesterday commented on my "big bouncing tits." FML

#21454460
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22564) - you deserved it (1983)

On 08/10/2015 at 8:32pm - misc - by Mrs. W. (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, I was at the store with my father. As we were leaving, he grabbed a baguette, put it by his crotch, and took a picture with his phone. I'm starting to feel like the parent here. FML

#21449663
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21311) - you deserved it (1711)

On 07/30/2015 at 7:24pm - misc - by EmbarrassedChild - United States

Today, during my father's funeral, I heard my mother-in-law mutter, "No loss there. Lazy cunt." FML

#21449050
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27330) - you deserved it (1464)

On 07/29/2015 at 1:00pm - misc - by HF44 (man) - United States (California)

Today, I watched a young shop assistant try her hardest to flirt with my 20-year-old son. When he continued to be totally oblivious, she outright invited him back to her flat. When he asked, "What for?" a piece of my soul died at how completely I have failed as a father. FML

#21442690
160 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32039) - you deserved it (4214)

On 07/16/2015 at 6:21pm - kids - by anonymous - United Kingdom (London, City of)

Today, my father lectured me for dating a man with "no future". even though he's entering a PhD program next year at a top university. Meanwhile, my dad's last relationship was with a 20-year-old hooker who ended up stealing his credit cards. FML

#21438331
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26362) - you deserved it (1629)

On 07/08/2015 at 2:17am - misc - by WayToGoDaddyHo (woman) - United States (Oregon)

Today, I woke up with a electric dog collar on my neck. I wouldn't have noticed it until my stepfather turned the collar to the highest intensity just to wake me up. FML

#21436783
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24099) - you deserved it (1733)

On 07/05/2015 at 12:26pm - misc - by izaya - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I was at the market when a guy started telling the man I was with how "curly-haired women are an adventure," saying what he would do to a woman like me. He was talking to my father. FML

#21432440
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24607) - you deserved it (1506)

On 06/26/2015 at 5:46pm - misc - by Nope (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I was informed, after being broken up with, that my girlfriend's father only set her up with me so that she would have more motivation to shower on a regular basis. He actually yelled at me for being broken up with. FML

#21431508
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24034) - you deserved it (1785)

On 06/24/2015 at 11:54pm - love - by Anonymouss (man) - United States

Today, I overheard my soon to be step-daughter telling her friend on the phone that she hopes that me and her father's wedding is just a big joke and that he isn't really going to go through with it. I just dropped five grand on a dress and venue. She's in for a surprise. FML

#21430948
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23893) - you deserved it (2521)

On 06/24/2015 at 12:02am - love - by bummed out step monster - United States (California)



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