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FML with : blowjob

Number of results : 36

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Today, my boyfriend was watching TV, when we started getting frisky. I'd just started to give him a blowjob when he pushed me off and said, "Fun's over." Dragon Ball Z had just come back on. He's 21. FML

#20632729
190 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42468) - you deserved it (10078)

On 04/30/2013 at 1:35pm - intimacy - by SecondBest,IGuess (woman) - United States

Today, my husband tried to haggle a blowjob out of me in exchange for taking his first shower in nearly two weeks. FML

#20605100
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37029) - you deserved it (5779)

On 04/19/2013 at 2:28pm - love - by Anonymous - United States

Today, my boyfriend, whom I haven't heard from in a whole month, turned up at my door because it was apparently "steak and blowjob day." FML

#20543142
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34999) - you deserved it (5207)

On 03/14/2013 at 5:02am - intimacy - by howaboutno (woman) - United States

Today, I was giving my guy a blowjob. When he blurted out, "Oh Jesus" I assumed I was doing a good job. I looked up to see the expression on his face and noticed a look of terror. He was staring at my growling cat, two seconds away from clawing his face off. FML

#20514475
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27127) - you deserved it (3270)

On 02/20/2013 at 1:55am - intimacy - by jealouspussy (woman) - United States (California)

Today, after giving my husband a new video game that he's been wanting, along with homemade waffles and a surprise blowjob, he gave me my gift: two packets of ramen noodles, and toilet paper. FML

#20423477
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33254) - you deserved it (3159)

On 12/26/2012 at 12:25pm - love - by annie_nk (woman) - United States (Utah)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend by waking him up with a blowjob, because he had always told me that it was a sexy fantasy of his. When he finally woke up, he got pissed off, rudely accused me of interrupting his beauty sleep, then soundly lay back down and fell asleep again. FML

#20169340
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26051) - you deserved it (3310)

On 11/19/2012 at 10:12am - intimacy - by nextcontestant16 - United States

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me. He decided that the best time would be while I was giving him a blowjob. He then seemed confused as to why I didn't finish. FML

#20114701
165 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23830) - you deserved it (2055)

On 10/13/2012 at 8:04am - intimacy - by notthebesttime -

Today, in the middle of what had to be the most amazing blowjob I've ever had in my life, my girlfriend had a mental breakdown and began weeping on top of my cock. FML

#20070700
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20331) - you deserved it (5239)

On 09/13/2012 at 8:06pm - intimacy - by blueballs (man) - United States (California)

Today, my vegan girlfriend refused to give me a blowjob because, apparently, blowjobs aren't vegan. FML

#20034900
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25178) - you deserved it (6388)

On 08/22/2012 at 12:19am - intimacy - by ihateveganism (man) - United States (Rhode Island)

Today, I was eating a banana, and decided to practice my blowjob skills, since my boyfriend is always complaining that I'm bad at giving head. Let's just say my lungs now have their daily dose of potassium. FML

#19450302
284 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6747) - you deserved it (21843)

On 04/11/2012 at 3:53pm - intimacy - by potassiumgirl - United States (Florida)

Today, I almost got a blowjob for the first time. Except I came before I even got in her mouth. FML

#18430652
244 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34073) - you deserved it (11972)

On 12/04/2011 at 8:30pm - intimacy - by Rumpkis (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I dislocated my jaw while giving my boyfriend a blowjob. FML

#18051286
352 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34760) - you deserved it (14395)

On 10/23/2011 at 1:45am - intimacy - by canucks_chick - Canada

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob. It gave him a panic attack. FML

#17685496
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24103) - you deserved it (3457)

On 09/07/2011 at 12:10am - intimacy - by Nublet (woman) - United States

Today, I got into a fight with my boyfriend. The only thing he could think of to cheer me up was to give me "permission" to give him a blowjob. FML

#17429477
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27994) - you deserved it (4854)

On 08/10/2011 at 1:47pm - intimacy - by noway - Singapore

Today, I gave my boyfriend a blowjob for the first time. This is the moment he chooses to exclaim, "Wow, you really do have a lot of dandruff!" FML

#15805096
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34349) - you deserved it (8680) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 04/16/2011 at 7:28am - intimacy - by Proprepourtant - France



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