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FML with : call of duty

Number of results : 630

Today, I asked my spouse to help me apply some hemorrhoid relief cream, since I couldn't see what was going on down there clearly. Next time, I hope I'll remember if I'm still in a conference call with my online classmates so they don't witness the whole thing again. FML

Today, I called this girl I've had a crush on for 2 years to confess my love to her. However, as she picked up the phone, I got so nervous that I froze and couldn't say a word. I was standing there, breathing heavily for 20 seconds. She got so freaked out that she threatened to call the police. FML

#21317815
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28773) - you deserved it (7716)

On 12/15/2014 at 6:59am - love - by LonelyGuy (man) - Australia

Today, at work, due to a mix up, I had to call an answering service. I am also from an answering service. We got the problem fixed but I couldn't hang up due to company policy. She couldn't hang up either. We both had to get our supervisors for permission to hang up. FML

#21312305
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32272) - you deserved it (3016)

On 12/06/2014 at 12:18am - work - by ring-a-ding-ding (woman) - United States (Nevada)

Today, while working in a restaurant, a woman told me I was completely incompetent, was the worst hostess she'd ever seen, and that she would call my district manager non-stop until I was fired. I'd clocked in less than 10 minutes before and hadn't said a single word to her. FML

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35219) - you deserved it (3198)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)

Today, while at work, I had to spend an hour and a half on the phone, listening to an old lady relive her entire day in excruciating detail. We're not allowed to hang up on customers, and she was extremely quick to dismiss all my attempts to steer the call back on topic. FML

#21308187
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28822) - you deserved it (3146)

On 11/29/2014 at 2:45pm - work - by gotta euthanize em all (man) - Canada

Today, I agreed to give my husband head while he played Call of Duty. I was happy because he enjoyed it at first, until he started getting his ass kicked in the game. He lost and angrily blamed me for distracting him. FML

#21306254
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33836) - you deserved it (5338)

On 11/26/2014 at 2:41pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (California)

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

#21299443
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29595) - you deserved it (8013)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:25am - misc - by That_Indian_Guy (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, I got sick at school. When someone called my mom for permission for me to leave, she told them she doesn't have a daughter and to never call that number again. FML

Today, I was shopping at my workplace, out of uniform, with my husband. A customer recognised me and wanted me to serve him, but I couldn't since we can be fired for doing so while off-duty. He complained to my manager, who wasted no time publicly bitching me out. FML

#21285416
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33520) - you deserved it (2155)

On 10/26/2014 at 1:53am - work - by iskiel (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I showed up to work and my boss was nowhere to be found. A phone call later, I find out he's in Dubai. Oh, and since I'm his personal assistant, I should be able to take care of matters until he gets back. I've only been his assistant for a week. FML

#21281510
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31372) - you deserved it (2194)

On 10/20/2014 at 12:53am - work - by are you kidding me - United States (Kansas)

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend, but I was so nervous that I had a panic attack, fainted and split my head open. My girlfriend then fainted at the sight of the blood. An onlooker had to call an ambulance for both of us. FML

#21280696
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35807) - you deserved it (3586)

On 10/18/2014 at 9:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I sent my fiancé a sexy picture while I was at work. I never got a response from him, so I gave him a call after a while. His 9-year-old son answered. Apparently he was getting a haircut at the time. FML

#21280130
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30483) - you deserved it (8243)

On 10/17/2014 at 10:23pm - intimacy - by melissa1028 (woman) - United States

Today, I found out that the neighborhood call-girl my husband and I secretly joke about is the same woman who secretly pleasures my husband for money. FML

#21263093
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40980) - you deserved it (4773)

On 09/22/2014 at 12:43pm - intimacy - by mislead - United States (Louisiana)

Today, I'm so broke that I had to call in sick to work because I couldn't afford to pay my bus fare. FML

#21260606
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38829) - you deserved it (4380)

On 09/18/2014 at 11:38am - money - by Anonymous (man) - Taiwan (T'ai-pei)



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