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FML with : birthday

Number of results : 612

Today, it was my birthday. I only got one message, from my dad, which was a sexual image meant for my mother. FML

#21110643
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36694) - you deserved it (2517)

On 04/11/2014 at 9:40pm - misc - by Anonymous - Canada

Today, my psycho ex boyfriend, who I broke up with over a month ago showed up at my work yelling and crying because I didn't get him anything for his birthday. My boss now thinks I'm an asshole. FML

#21109350
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37332) - you deserved it (3734)

On 04/10/2014 at 11:50am - misc - by crazytown (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, I was having my birthday party. My dad showed up late, blind drunk, and drove his car straight through my garage door. FML

#21105340
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38105) - you deserved it (2746)

On 04/05/2014 at 6:04pm - misc - by as-salamu alaykum, motherfucker - United Kingdom (Wirral)

Today, I realized how sad my life is when for my 18th birthday, I went to a strip club, by myself, in GTA V. FML

#21092916
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38991) - you deserved it (7021)

On 03/21/2014 at 7:42pm - misc - by BMTH2296 (man) - United States

Today, I was making a special birthday delivery for a customer. As I handed her the fruit basket, I said, "Hey, we have the same birthday! Happy birthday!" She called me an attention whore and slammed the door in my face. FML

Today, I was fired over the phone, losing my only source of income. When asked if I was okay, I explained that although I understood why, I was a little peeved they'd chosen my birthday to deliver the message. My - now former - boss then sang "Happy Birthday" to me in its entirety. FML

#21090716
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39616) - you deserved it (3474)

On 03/19/2014 at 8:28am - work - by pale-suzie (woman) - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, my friends hired a male stripper to give me a lap dance for my birthday. It was all pretty nice until he let rip one of the most nauseating farts I've ever encountered, right in my face. Hours later, I can still smell it. FML

#21086642
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44398) - you deserved it (4915)

On 03/14/2014 at 4:45pm - intimacy - by polebitch49 (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I was supposed to be studying for an important exam. My parents decided to make me go to a surprise birthday party instead. We weren't allowed to leave until the party was over. The party was for the dog. FML

#21073158
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38143) - you deserved it (3146)

On 02/27/2014 at 1:30pm - animals - by SchoolFMLs (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, a guy from work that I barely know gave me sunflowers for my birthday. He told me, "You mentioned they were your favorite." I mentioned it to my family at home a few days ago. FML

#21069947
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42592) - you deserved it (3482)

On 02/23/2014 at 11:18pm - love - by You Are My Sunshine (woman) - United States (California)

Today, my family and I were celebrating my dad's birthday. The two of us were standing by the pool chatting, and I jokingly said "You're old now." I suppose I should have expected him to shove me into the pool, my phone still in hand, and retort, "You're soaked now." FML

#21054564
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30065) - you deserved it (15712)

On 02/08/2014 at 3:54pm - misc - by fuck you, dad (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was reading FML's birthday blog post and saw a picture of myself in it. I would've been happy if it wasn't #4 in the list of worst duckfaces of the week. FML

#21040870
169 comments

Today, after spending the night out with her friends to celebrate her birthday, my girlfriend paid me a surprise visit at home, only to find women's lingerie on my bed. She wouldn't believe they were gifts for her, even though they still had the tags on them. FML

#21032861
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43846) - you deserved it (4037)

On 01/19/2014 at 2:12pm - love - by .... (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, it was my birthday, so when I woke up, I came downstairs yelling, "ALL I WANT FOR MY BIRTHDAY, IS A BIG BOOTY HOE," only to find that my family had thrown me a surprise party. All my grandparents were at the bottom of the stairs. FML

#21025933
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30270) - you deserved it (37451)

On 01/12/2014 at 8:40pm - misc - by anonymous - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I sang "happy birthday" to my best friend. Sadly, it was while waitressing at work, where they were having a celebration I hadn't been invited to in the first place. FML

#21024621
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48524) - you deserved it (3385)

On 01/11/2014 at 3:26pm - misc - by left out - United States (Ohio)

Today, I joined my friends out birthday clubbing. After I'd gotten a little drunk, a few guys asked for my number. I rattled off random numbers, until I accidentally said my mother's. Guess who woke up to a text at 2:17 in the morning, containing a picture of a penis. FML

#21022033
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26097) - you deserved it (33838)

On 01/08/2014 at 7:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (South Carolina)



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