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FML with : birthday

Number of results : 643

Today, it's my 20th birthday. I recently came home from college to visit my family, after my mother had a stroke a few weeks back. She ended up being the only person who remembered to get me anything. She also thinks it's still 2009. FML

#21286282
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32105) - you deserved it (2728)

On 10/27/2014 at 12:44pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Illinois)

Today, my son gave me a bottle of shampoo for my birthday. I'm as bald as a coot. FML

#21282364
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29563) - you deserved it (2852)

On 10/21/2014 at 11:41am - kids - by Bald (man) - Turkey (Istanbul)

Today, the kids on my cross country team were planning a big surprise party for one of the girls, whose birthday is in a few weeks. It's my birthday today. FML

#21281118
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31158) - you deserved it (2118)

On 10/19/2014 at 2:19pm - misc - by forgotten (woman) - United States (California)

Today, it's my mom's birthday. Got the perfect gift, the perfect card and of course the perfect cake. Well, it was the perfect cake until my dog's ass crushed it. FML

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

#21276832
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36570) - you deserved it (7168)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - intimacy - by badplacerightnow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, it's my birthday. I've spent most of it apologizing to my parents for the "hassle" of "having" to arrange a simple birthday dinner. Sorry I was born, guys. FML

#21269752
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33340) - you deserved it (2663)

On 10/02/2014 at 7:51pm - misc - by Sorry (woman) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, I asked my 12-year-old son what he wanted for his birthday. He looked me dead in the eyes and said, "A whore." FML

#21265910
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39871) - you deserved it (6300)

On 09/26/2014 at 5:07pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Florida)

Today, my co-workers threw me a surprise 30th birthday party. After lighting sparklers on the cake and singing happy birthday, we all enjoyed a few moments of sparkly, happy fun time. Then the building's fire alarm tripped and over 200 people had to be evacuated. FML

#21259630
39 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30999) - you deserved it (3751)

On 09/16/2014 at 7:23pm - work - by so so old now (woman) - Canada (British Columbia)

Today, it's my birthday, and everyone, family and friends, forgot. Except my dog who left me a present on my bed. FML

#21253357
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38787) - you deserved it (2756)

On 09/06/2014 at 11:06pm - animals - by Meowit (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I bought a large ice cream cake. No, there's no occasion, but I did ask the cashier to write "Happy Birthday" on it, just so she wouldn't know I was going to eat it all myself. FML

#21252624
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32264) - you deserved it (9207)

On 09/05/2014 at 8:13pm - misc - by tbee - United States (Illinois)

Today, I finally told my dad that I hate his girlfriend. I said her daughter's a complete whore, and her son is annoying as fuck. Turns out they were in the house and within earshot, ready to throw me a birthday party. FML

#21243310
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23662) - you deserved it (28)

On 08/22/2014 at 6:18pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, it's my birthday. When I asked my mom if we were gonna do anything special for my birthday. She said, "don't lie to me. It's not your birthday." FML

#21238688
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44205) - you deserved it (3085)

On 08/16/2014 at 1:09am - misc - by bad birthdays - United States (California)

Today, I should be spending my birthday with my boyfriend of 8 months. Instead he's visiting his ex, who's pregnant with a baby that "may or may not be" his. FML.

#21228356
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (43871) - you deserved it (5811)

On 08/03/2014 at 11:13am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Georgia)

Today, my ex-boyfriend surprised me with a gorgeous, giant stuffed tiger as a belated birthday gift. I thought it was a lovely gesture until a friend told me she had thrown it in the dumpster behind our building this morning. FML

#21226147
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35519) - you deserved it (3405)

On 07/31/2014 at 8:17pm - love - by Does this thought count? (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, it's my birthday. The only thing I received was a bill for a piss test I took earlier this year. FML

#21220823
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37327) - you deserved it (3542)

On 07/26/2014 at 12:55am - misc - by birthday girl - United States (Ohio)



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