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FML with : sex

Number of results : 1473

Today, my mom came into my room to yell at me because she thought she heard me having sex, saying I'm too young for it. I'm 23 and I wasn't having sex. The noises were from my dad watching porn in the next room. FML

#21343705
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17238) - you deserved it (1246)

On 01/24/2015 at 10:26pm - intimacy - by confused (man) - United States (Minnesota)

Today, I realized my job working with food is getting to me. While having sex with my boyfriend, I fell asleep. He asked me what I was doing, and apparently I sleep-talked, saying "I'm chopping lettuce". FML

#21343098
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25018) - you deserved it (3104)

On 01/23/2015 at 8:29pm - intimacy - by xoragebaby - United States

Today, while begging my wife for sex for once, she told me she didn't have time. I said it wouldn't take long. She said "I know." FML

#21341633
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27095) - you deserved it (8165)

On 01/21/2015 at 2:06pm - intimacy - by cuckolddreams - United States (Oklahoma)

Today, I babysat an 11 year old kid while his parents ate out. As soon as they left, the kid asked me if I wanted to be on the sex offender's list. Before I could even process that, he told me to stay out of his way and he wouldn't accuse me of anything. FML

#21341483
129 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33025) - you deserved it (2112)

On 01/21/2015 at 6:57am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, I was having sex with my boyfriend in his car. We were in the front seat and I was on top. My ass hit the horn and scared my boyfriend so bad, he jumped, causing me to hit my head so hard that I swear I got a concussion. FML

#21341327
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26104) - you deserved it (9550)

On 01/20/2015 at 11:10pm - intimacy - by chelse_elyce - United States

Today, I sat my son down for the sex talk. By the time it was over, he'd corrected me on several factual errors and told me what felching is. Now I remember why I never wanted kids. FML

#21340142
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29976) - you deserved it (6339)

On 01/19/2015 at 9:34am - kids - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maine)

Today, my mother told me how long it took for her to have me. Not how long she carried me in her womb - how long it took her and my dad to have sex. FML

#21339798
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26340) - you deserved it (2181)

On 01/18/2015 at 8:18pm - intimacy - by -.- - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my boyfriend's dad called me a whore and said I'm trying to use his son and "steal" his virginity for my own needs. My boyfriend has had sex with over 10 girls and I'm a virgin. FML

#21339329
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35923) - you deserved it (2578)

On 01/18/2015 at 1:29am - intimacy - by virginwhore (woman) -

Today, like every other day at work, I had to listen to people talk about being addicted to sex. I have to treat people for addiction to something I've never even had. FML

#21337533
105 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29848) - you deserved it (4573)

On 01/15/2015 at 10:12am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I found out how whipped I am when, at the climax of sex, I moaned, "I'm sorry!" FML

#21337152
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25884) - you deserved it (5994)

On 01/14/2015 at 6:57pm - intimacy - by imsorry (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was trying on a shirt and asked my boyfriend if he liked it. He replied, "If I say no, can we still have sex tonight?" FML

#21336880
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29504) - you deserved it (5636)

On 01/14/2015 at 8:58am - love - by Anonymous - United States (Colorado)

Today, my little brother walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex and threatened to tell my parents. I paid him $30 to keep quiet. 15 minutes later he told them. FML

#21335701
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31814) - you deserved it (11453)

On 01/12/2015 at 11:43am - intimacy - by bowler99 - United States (New York)

Today, my boyfriend and I had 'car sex'. It sucked and resulted in him masturbating into a McDonald's bag. FML

#21335578
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28974) - you deserved it (5818)

On 01/12/2015 at 2:56am - intimacy - by briiiiiiii123 - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying something new. I ended up with a shard of glass in my back and a concussion. Don't have sex on a glass table. FML

#21335128
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17502) - you deserved it (25621)

On 01/11/2015 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, I got a yeast infection, caused by the antibiotics for my UTI. I got the UTI after having sex for the first time in a year. A couple of minutes of sex have ruined my health. FML

#21334755
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26443) - you deserved it (3834)

On 01/10/2015 at 10:21pm - health - by so much for romance - United States (New York)



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