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FML with : car

Number of results : 2851

Today, I got fired for having a visible tattoo on my neck. The tattoo in question is a scar from a surgery I had 2 months ago. The same one paid for by my employer's insurance and missed 2 weeks of work for. FML

#21381191
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24399) - you deserved it (1481)

On 03/25/2015 at 8:23am - work - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)

Today, it's been three months since my sister broke her car, meaning she couldn't get to work, and I've giving her money every month so she could buy food and so on. I just found out that her workplace is less than 200 metres from where she lives. FML

#21381106
69 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22374) - you deserved it (3509)

On 03/25/2015 at 1:42am - love - by Julie - Denmark (Midtjylland)

Today, my boyfriend wrecked our car. Now I can't get to work in order to make the money we need to buy a new one. FML

#21380086
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26741) - you deserved it (2952)

On 03/23/2015 at 11:51am - money - by stuck - United States (Illinois)

Today, when I dropped my 6-year-old daughter off at school, a little boy ran up to her so I asked his name. My daughter explained: "Oh, don't pay any attention to him, he's my slave. He's come to carry my bag. See you later, mom!" FML

#21377549
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33491) - you deserved it (4393) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 03/18/2015 at 11:22pm - kids - by mafille - France

Today, my mom and I made the bad decision to go hiking for some mother-daughter bonding even though we had little experience. My mother tumbled down a mountain named Tumbledown and I couldn't even enjoy the irony because I had to half carry her all the way back to the car. FML

#21375957
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26584) - you deserved it (3063)

On 03/16/2015 at 8:56pm - health - by manderpander21 - United States (New York)

Today, my instructor turned up late to get me for my driving test. I soon realized something was seriously wrong. Turned out his wife left him last night, and he'd been drinking the pain away all morning. He ended up rear-ending another car, and now I have to reschedule my test. FML

#21374413
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29810) - you deserved it (2204)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:11pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, while on a date, I desperately let out a stealth fart in my date's car. I didn't have the nerve to own up to it, even as he started panicking and thinking the smell was coming from his engine. FML

#21374172
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26691) - you deserved it (7076)

On 03/14/2015 at 12:27am - misc - by thecarisfine (woman) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking my dog. Suddenly, my insane neighbor who loves dogs a bit too much comes over and asks to pet my dog. I say OK, thinking that if I watch her, she won't do anything. I turn around to make sure no cars are coming and when I turn back, she's trying to steal my dog. FML

Today, I've managed to go my whole nine-year teaching career without anyone vomiting in my classroom. That record was broken today when someone vomited four successive times in front of a class of 46 students. It was me. FML

#21373013
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30783) - you deserved it (2494)

On 03/12/2015 at 6:23am - work - by musicteacher - United States (North Carolina)

Today, the only birthday present I got was a gift card to a steak house. Not a bad gift, but I'm a vegan. FML

#21371753
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30377) - you deserved it (7229)

On 03/10/2015 at 9:27am - misc - by oh well - United States

Today, while chatting with my in-laws, I told them about my upcoming spinal surgery. Soon after, when I went to get us some drinks, I overheard them murmuring about how many surgeries I've already had, how I'm a drain on the healthcare system, and how I should ideally just die. FML

#21369784
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33519) - you deserved it (2173)

On 03/07/2015 at 5:34am - health - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Edinburgh, City of)

Today, I saw my boss heading my way at work. He has a "no food in the office" policy, so I quickly scarfed down my pop-tart. I ended up choking on it so hard that I threw up. FML

#21369280
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22672) - you deserved it (17550)

On 03/06/2015 at 12:41pm - work - by f*ck (man) - Australia (South Australia)

Today, during a family game of "Cards Against Humanity," I had to explain to my mom what queefing is. FML

Today, I got into an accident. As I was talking to a police officer about what happened, the tow truck driver managed to take my car and drive away, leaving me with no phone or wallet. I just spent an hour walking home in a hail storm. FML

#21368246
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28858) - you deserved it (2467)

On 03/04/2015 at 8:18pm - misc - by neverforgetyourphone - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I thought I had carbon monoxide poisoning because I had the symptoms and my detector was going off. I called the fire dept, they checked me, they checked my apartment. My apartment is fine; I'm just out of shape, have high blood pressure, and don't know how to work simple electronics. FML

#21367736
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27337) - you deserved it (8813)

On 03/04/2015 at 12:12am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)



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