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FML with : mom

Number of results : 2041

Today, I was doing laundry, so I decided to wash my cat's blanket. He chased me down the stairs into the basement, and I slightly closed the door behind me so he wouldn't follow me. He pushed the door shut, which automatically locks. I was trapped down there for 3 hours until my mom came home. FML

#21364131
24 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3514) - you deserved it (702)

On 02/26/2015 at 7:08pm - animals - by jynxisadouchebag - United States (California)

Today, my mom told me she'd canceled my spring break trip to Europe for my 16th birthday. Why? So I could get my wisdom teeth pulled 2 months early. FML

#21363900
63 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15793) - you deserved it (2408)

On 02/26/2015 at 11:18am - health - by gatewayev700 - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I was at a friend's birthday party when I got a call from my mom telling me to come home because my dog died. When I told my friend that I had to leave because of the loss, she replied with, "Okay, but you brought my gift inside, right?" FML

#21363530
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21101) - you deserved it (1630)

On 02/25/2015 at 8:43pm - animals - by natashamilan - United States (Michigan)

Today, I had a talk with my daughter about how I hope her first boyfriend is a special one because 'spending the night' with a boy is a big deal. She replied with a giggle, "Mom, I lost my virginity in a parking lot three years ago!" FML

#21362728
135 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26331) - you deserved it (5489)

On 02/24/2015 at 5:25pm - intimacy - by Like mother like daughter (woman) - United States (Colorado)

Today, my mom sent me a pic of a blank paper, saying it was a drawing of all the people who wanted to date me. FML

#21362620
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28140) - you deserved it (2408)

On 02/24/2015 at 2:32pm - misc - by toastynippies - United States

Today, my mom told me that, even though my brother sells drugs, he's still her favorite child. FML

#21359996
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30962) - you deserved it (2515)

On 02/20/2015 at 7:35pm - misc - by pissed - United States (Illinois)

Today, I went to my son's school soccer game. Unfortunately, I couldn't get excited about it because my idiot son kept diving the moment anyone so much as breathed on him. It eventually earned him a penalty shot that won him the game. I was so ashamed, I snuck out to avoid being seen with him. FML

#21358080
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29716) - you deserved it (8905)

On 02/17/2015 at 3:02pm - kids - by Clive81 (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I went out to dinner for my mom's birthday. I'd planned for a nice restaurant which is always packed, so I'd called for a reservation. When we got there, the hostess tried to turn us down because no one ever takes their mother out to dinner anymore, and that I was a fraud. FML

Today, I accidentally crashed my mom's car into my dad's car. FML

#21357430
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30283) - you deserved it (11874)

On 02/16/2015 at 3:43pm - misc - by cactii - United States

Today, my mom's obsession with cleanliness hit a new low when she bitched at me for having trash in my trash can. FML

#21355983
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30318) - you deserved it (2051)

On 02/14/2015 at 2:02pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Illinois)

Today, I got a text from my mom shaming me for forgetting my sister's birthday. It isn't her birthday today, it's mine. FML

#21355845
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34744) - you deserved it (1832)

On 02/14/2015 at 9:10am - misc - by secret - United States (Connecticut)

Today, while watching a clip of the show "16 and Pregnant" on YouTube in my room, my mom yelled from the kitchen that dinner was ready. Without skipping a beat, I yelled back, "I'm pregnant!" I'm a guy. FML

Today, I made my mom breakfast in bed for her birthday. She was naked when I went to give it to her. FML

#21354690
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29012) - you deserved it (5687)

On 02/12/2015 at 12:23pm - misc - by ahhhhhh (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, my mom asked my siblings and me for help cleaning the kitchen. After working for a half hour while all my siblings sat on the couch, I pointed out that I was the only one working. My mom thanked my siblings for not having attitudes like mine and sent me to my room. FML

#21352465
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34204) - you deserved it (2687)

On 02/08/2015 at 11:47pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Arizona)

Today, while shopping with my 6-year-old daughter, she said, "Mommy, remember you wanna get duck tape!" A middle-aged guy nearby scoffed and told her: "DUCT, not DUCK. Dumb cunt." I ended up having to drive my bawling daughter home with no shopping. FML

#21352119
290 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42970) - you deserved it (2975)

On 02/08/2015 at 2:16pm - kids - by Anonymous (woman) -



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