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FML with : dog

Number of results : 787

Today, I was at a friend's birthday party when I got a call from my mom telling me to come home because my dog died. When I told my friend that I had to leave because of the loss, she replied with, "Okay, but you brought my gift inside, right?" FML

#21363530
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25912) - you deserved it (2090)

On 02/25/2015 at 8:43pm - animals - by natashamilan - United States (Michigan)

Today, my girlfriend got her wisdom teeth removed. I really want to help her out while she recovers, but her swollen cheeks combined with her natural buck teeth keep making me crack up every time I see her. I can't help it and I'm now in the doghouse. FML

#21360286
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21171) - you deserved it (26857)

On 02/21/2015 at 9:20am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Birmingham)

Today, it was snowing but I had to let my dog out, so I picked him up and carried him outside. I slipped, landed on him and ended up breaking his leg. FML

#21359968
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31301) - you deserved it (6077)

On 02/20/2015 at 6:49pm - animals - by anonymous - United States (Arkansas)

Today, whilst walking to a primary school to give pupils a lesson on cleanliness, I tripped and landed on a dog turd. FML

#21359149
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26066) - you deserved it (2735)

On 02/19/2015 at 11:06am - misc - by anonymous - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I was chased out of my own house by my wife's lover's dog. FML

#21352647
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35322) - you deserved it (2782)

On 02/09/2015 at 9:53am - animals - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my girlfriend ran off with my beloved dog. Why? Yesterday she asked me who I'd choose, and I honestly said that I would choose the dog. FML

Today, I shaved my beard in preparation for an important work conference. Now my dog won't stop growling and barking at me. FML

#21345020
47 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25136) - you deserved it (2879)

On 01/27/2015 at 10:09am - animals - by dogproblems (man) - United States (North Carolina)

Today, it's been 3 months since my dog scratched my 9 year old granddaughter after she walked over and repeatedly kicked him. My daughter has disowned me and won't let me see my own grandchildren until I have my companion of 11 years "destroyed". FML

#21343453
217 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36413) - you deserved it (2306)

On 01/24/2015 at 1:33pm - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - Romania (Giurgiu)

Today, I was accused of letting my dog take a shit on the sidewalk and not picking it up. My dog's a chihuahua, and the turd was almost longer than he is. I got fined anyway. FML

#21339093
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28513) - you deserved it (4836) - Translated from the french version of FML. Bon appétit!

On 01/17/2015 at 4:12pm - animals - by Titatoum - Belgium (Brussels Hoofdstedelijk Gewest)

Today, I told my dog to give me the stick he had in his mouth so I could throw it for him. After I picked it up I realized it was a dried-out piece of shit. FML

#21338477
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20965) - you deserved it (12192)

On 01/16/2015 at 7:37pm - animals - by Anonymous - United States (New Jersey)

Today, I wanted to surprise my roommate by picking her up from class with her dog. Her dog decided to surprise me by dumping a load on my passenger seat. FML

#21337685
38 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17319) - you deserved it (14937)

On 01/15/2015 at 3:30pm - animals - by surprise - United States (Mississippi)

Today, my girlfriend was making lunch and asked me to pass her the peanut butter. I'll never know why, but as I handed it to her I said the first thing that came to mind: "I really want a dog." She looked at me in horror, then told me to get out of her house. FML

#21334531
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24188) - you deserved it (4261)

On 01/10/2015 at 3:00pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Vermont)

Today, I got mugged while walking my dog. He seemed to be OK with it. FML

#21326870
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27369) - you deserved it (2506)

On 12/29/2014 at 11:17pm - animals - by woofwoof - Turkey (Izmir)

Today, at Christmas dinner, my grandmother talked about the death of every single dog she ever had. All 10 of them. FML

#21323815
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29663) - you deserved it (2461)

On 12/25/2014 at 6:47am - misc - by dunn76 - United States

Today, I was home alone when I heard the carbon-monoxide detector beeping. Panicking, I grabbed my dog, ran out of my house as fast as I could, and waited outside for 3 hours for my mom to get home. Turned out the detector was just out of batteries. FML

#21315834
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26587) - you deserved it (6710)

On 12/11/2014 at 9:04pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Virginia)



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