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FML with : girlfriend

Number of results : 2217

Today, I met my best friend's girlfriend for the first time. After a few hours of talking and eating, she followed me to the bathroom and said, dead serious, ''If you ever touch him or get too close to him, I will cut you''. I've known him for twelve years, they have been dating for a month. FML

#21305050
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27819) - you deserved it (1960)

On 11/24/2014 at 8:44am - love - by ohwell (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

#21300928
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18169) - you deserved it (29189)

On 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I heard my mother say, "I feel bad for any girl that marries him because he's, what's the word? Metrosexual!" To my girlfriend. About me. FML

#21300656
66 comments

Today, my girlfriend of over a year broke up with me via Facebook chat. When I asked her why, she replied "You know why." and blocked me. No, I don't know. FML

#21299125
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30935) - you deserved it (2526)

On 11/14/2014 at 7:11pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Pennsylvania)

Today, I found out one of my girlfriend's recent Google searches was, "should I admit to cheating or just dump him?" FML

#21299071
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31303) - you deserved it (2002)

On 11/14/2014 at 5:36pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I found out that my girlfriend was cheating on me. Her excuse? I was the one that had initially introduced them. FML

#21298582
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31073) - you deserved it (2616)

On 11/13/2014 at 7:59pm - intimacy - by johnnycomehelpme - United States (Illinois)

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend of 5 years. She bitched me out for not getting the ring she had been "hinting" me to get, and angrily left. FML

#21298350
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35271) - you deserved it (4148)

On 11/13/2014 at 1:50pm - love - by Anonymous - South Africa (Western Cape)

Today, someone commented on my mother's memorial page on my blog. It said "u need too get over it bitch" and "ur mum was a wh0re". I looked up the IP address and found the comment was posted from my own wifi. The only other person who lives in my house is my girlfriend. FML

#21297662
109 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41853) - you deserved it (3159)

On 11/12/2014 at 12:21pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom (Redcar and Cleveland)

Today, I thought I felt my cellphone vibrating. Turned out it was just my girlfriend letting out a vicious fart against my leg. FML

#21296102
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34483) - you deserved it (4897)

On 11/10/2014 at 9:28am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Germany (Berlin)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me via Twitter. FML

#21295236
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32858) - you deserved it (3208)

On 11/09/2014 at 3:37am - love - by Anonymous - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I learned that when you're talking about your girlfriend's 6'4", 250 lb dad in a negative way, you should really make sure he isn't around first. FML

#21295068
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17823) - you deserved it (34490)

On 11/08/2014 at 10:38pm - misc - by jlong9071 - United States (North Carolina)

Today, my phone died while I was on the phone with my girlfriend. When I finally got a charger, I saw a text message from her. I'm now single. FML

#21292826
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30091) - you deserved it (2567)

On 11/05/2014 at 5:21pm - love - by thedudeman14 (man) - United States (New York)

Today, I went down on my girlfriend for the first time. The words "Christ, Jeff. It's a vagina, not a burrito. CALM DOWN!" were spoken. FML

#21290417
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36209) - you deserved it (9911)

On 11/02/2014 at 10:36am - intimacy - by jay-frey96 (man) - United States (California)

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

#21289746
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34597) - you deserved it (4709)

On 11/01/2014 at 2:23pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Ohio)

Today, I found out that the girl on Facebook that helped me out of my sadness after my break-up and who I'd hopelessly fallen in love with was just a prank by my ex-girlfriend. FML

#21288808
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34234) - you deserved it (3681)

On 10/31/2014 at 12:25am - love - by facebookdeception - New Zealand (Auckland)



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