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FML with : girlfriend

Number of results : 2271

Today, I mentioned to my girlfriend that I sent in a job application after she went home. In front of her parents. Who thought she'd stayed the night at a friend's place. FML

#21344632
45 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5097) - you deserved it (1824)

On 01/26/2015 at 5:30pm - misc - by Ruhroh (man) - United States (Idaho)

Today, my girlfriend told me that her fear of PDA has gotten so bad, she doesn't think she'll even be able to kiss me on our wedding day. Her parents are going be there and she can't imagine showing affection in front of other people, let alone her parents. FML

#21342878
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28227) - you deserved it (2504)

On 01/23/2015 at 1:09pm - love - by uggg - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend was rushed to the hospital with anal tearing. We've never tried anal before, but it turns out she and my "best friend" sure have. FML

#21342800
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37357) - you deserved it (2366)

On 01/23/2015 at 9:58am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States

Today, I caught my girlfriend Googling how to uninstall Siri. I asked why she wanted to do that, and she said, "I don't like it. I don't like how the slut talks to you." I get the feeling I'll need a gun when I break up with this crazy fucker. FML

#21342067
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31042) - you deserved it (4513)

On 01/22/2015 at 1:41am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Georgia)

Today, I found out the pet name my girlfriend gave my penis wasn't randomly made up after all; it's her ex's name. FML

#21341448
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29750) - you deserved it (2562)

On 01/21/2015 at 3:33am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - New Zealand (Auckland)

Today, my girlfriend asked me not to love her so much, so she doesn't have to try so hard to match my love for her. What the fuck? FML

#21338940
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26634) - you deserved it (8480)

On 01/17/2015 at 2:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my nutjob girlfriend dumped me for refusing to stop talking to my best friend, just because she's a woman. Before she left, my now-ex decided to punish me by destroying the dissertation I've spent months working on, along with both backups of it. FML

#21337587
183 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35070) - you deserved it (3848)

On 01/15/2015 at 12:23pm - love - by Can I press charges? (man) - Australia (Queensland)

Today, I was walking with a female friend when suddenly, my ex-girlfriend comes running down the street and says, "So, you're cheating on me with this slut, huh?!" We've been separated for a decade now. FML

#21336664
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34955) - you deserved it (2458)

On 01/13/2015 at 10:05pm - love - by RipeFlame - United States (Florida)

Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML

#21336365
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34069) - you deserved it (2837)

On 01/13/2015 at 11:25am - love - by can't win - Australia

Today, my girlfriend gave me my first handjob. I was nervous, so when she went to do it, I panicked and yelled, "Firmly grasp it!" She then couldn't stop laughing because it was a line from SpongeBob. FML

Today, my little brother walked in on me and my girlfriend having sex and threatened to tell my parents. I paid him $30 to keep quiet. 15 minutes later he told them. FML

#21335701
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31908) - you deserved it (11501)

On 01/12/2015 at 11:43am - intimacy - by bowler99 - United States (New York)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me. Her reason? Not enough guys have been liking her photos on Instagram since we started dating. FML

#21335495
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33283) - you deserved it (2592)

On 01/12/2015 at 12:03am - love - by yankeeboy123 - United States (Florida)

Today, my girlfriend and I were trying something new. I ended up with a shard of glass in my back and a concussion. Don't have sex on a glass table. FML

#21335128
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17521) - you deserved it (25713)

On 01/11/2015 at 2:10pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Iowa)

Today, my girlfriend accused me of being insecure and feeling threatened by the fact that she has a daughter from a previous relationship. She's vaguely right; I feel threatened, but mainly because the psycho keeps threatening to stab me to death when her mom isn't around to hear. FML

#21334989
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31533) - you deserved it (2392)

On 01/11/2015 at 8:03am - kids - by StabStab (man) - Belgium

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me by canceling our relationship status on Facebook. I commented in disbelief, only for my dad to reply "#rekt", then "But seriously, about time. She's gonna give your balls back, right?" Thanks for the support. FML

#21334865
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26065) - you deserved it (3123)

On 01/11/2015 at 12:57am - love - by kumcat (man) - United States (Illinois)



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