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FML with : girlfriend

Number of results : 2327

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend having phone sex less than 10 feet away from me. FML

#21399833
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18832) - you deserved it (1376)

On 04/26/2015 at 3:09am - love - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, my girlfriend broke up with me because "God" told her to. I guess "God" didn't have any problems with me buying dinner first. FML

#21399506
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20864) - you deserved it (1640)

On 04/25/2015 at 1:55pm - love - by wil - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I brought my girlfriend home to introduce to my parents. My dad thought it would be hilarious to fill some clear bags full of flour, then pretend he was sampling a cocaine shipment when she arrived. She excused herself very quickly and isn't answering my calls. FML

#21399378
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23195) - you deserved it (1846)

On 04/25/2015 at 6:34am - love - by a critically injured shitehawk (man) - United Kingdom (York)

Today, my girlfriend confessed that she'd leave me for her ex in a heartbeat. Tomorrow is, or should I say "was", our wedding day. FML

#21399347
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25777) - you deserved it (1490)

On 04/25/2015 at 3:57am - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Montana)

Today, I learned that, when you ask your girlfriend "Do you think we're having sex too often?" she might interpret it as, "I don't think we should have sex ever again," and entirely stop talking to you. FML

#21398912
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19940) - you deserved it (8763)

On 04/24/2015 at 7:38am - intimacy - by Sexless from Texas - United States (Texas)

Today, my religious girlfriend convinced me to let her take my virginity. A few hours later, she broke up with me, crying and saying I was going to hell for having sex before marriage. But apparently she isn't, and she can't be with someone who "tempts" her. FML

#21397889
146 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29216) - you deserved it (2651)

On 04/22/2015 at 10:24am - intimacy - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Florida)

Today, my nurse girlfriend told me she's more attracted to the veins in my arm than any other part of me. FML

#21397356
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26276) - you deserved it (3128)

On 04/21/2015 at 9:48am - love - by veiny - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a theatre performance. I had to put on a lot of makeup for the role, and one of the guys said I looked nice. I smiled and said thanks. Seconds later, I'd been sucker-punched by his girlfriend for "flirting" with her man. FML

#21396780
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26860) - you deserved it (1838)

On 04/20/2015 at 10:45am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United Kingdom (Leicester)

Today, I found out my best friend's girlfriend is cheating on him with his own brother. I went over to his place and told him everything while his girlfriend was in the same room. He called me a jealous liar who wanted to break them up, and kicked me out while she looked on, smirking. FML

#21396139
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29172) - you deserved it (2896)

On 04/19/2015 at 9:08am - misc - by Anunimos (man) - Romania (Bucuresti)

Today, I poured my heart out to my girlfriend with a serenade. After I finished, she told me she'd come over to tell me she'd found someone else and wanted to break up. FML

#21395896
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28975) - you deserved it (2822)

On 04/18/2015 at 9:03pm - love - by socialix - United States (New Mexico)

Today, I got into an argument with my racist brother after he opened his god damn stupid mouth in front of my girlfriend. He actually tried to convince me that he's not a racist, because one of his favorite types of porn is black girls getting fucked by white guys. FML

#21395531
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28545) - you deserved it (2460)

On 04/18/2015 at 12:57am - misc - by assault and imnotracistbuttery (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I learned that my girlfriend is not a screamer nor a moaner, she's a biter. My arm is getting stitches right now. FML

#21393183
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27815) - you deserved it (2804)

On 04/13/2015 at 8:51pm - intimacy - by anon - United States

Today, my girlfriend started bitching me out about how public proposals are unfair and how they pressure a girl to say yes. All I did was get on my knee to tie a loose shoelace. FML

#21392927
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33127) - you deserved it (2605)

On 04/13/2015 at 12:38pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Connecticut)

Today, I was talking with my mother. As we went to say goodbye, she said "I love you". Out of habit of saying I love you to my girlfriend, I said, "Love you too babe". FML

Today, I visited my girlfriend's apartment for the first time. I guess she forgot to do some spring cleaning before I showed up, because I saw my laptop on her couch. The same laptop that was stolen from my house along with several other valuables last week. FML

#21387302
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34740) - you deserved it (2347)

On 04/04/2015 at 12:04am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Maryland)



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