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FML with : fart

Number of results : 128

Today, while flirting with a cute nurse at my dad's bedside, I accidentally let a noxious fart slip out and she thought the foul smell came from my sleeping father soiling himself. I let her roll him over and check his ass while he cried out in pain because I wasn't man enough to own up to it. FML

#21369082
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (3052) - you deserved it (7034)

On 03/06/2015 at 1:18am - health - by UncleMonkey (man) - United States (California)

Today, while having sex, my fiancé started talking dirty. I enjoyed it, until he had a brain fart and said, "God, you love fucking my pussy." FML

#21364648
71 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27235) - you deserved it (3054)

On 02/27/2015 at 2:37pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Michigan)

Today, my friend was confiding all her problems to me over Skype. I pressed the mute button so I could let out a fart, forgetting I'd already muted it earlier. I broke several minutes of my own silence with a devastating wet one. Now she won't talk to me. FML

#21364034
89 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26347) - you deserved it (12339)

On 02/26/2015 at 4:17pm - misc - by MuteNToot (man) -

Today, my boss was telling everyone his mother recently passed away and he'll be off work for a while. I'd been holding in painful gas for a while, so I tried to ease it out. It turned into a long, squeaky fart in front of everyone. Everyone glared at me as if I was trying to be funny. FML

#21351411
32 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27274) - you deserved it (6167)

On 02/07/2015 at 9:33am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom accused me of smoking weed. Truth is, I'd just ripped the quietest and weirdest smelling fart of my life. She wouldn't believe me, accused me of making stupid excuses up, and grounded me. FML

#21350938
60 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27951) - you deserved it (2534)

On 02/06/2015 at 1:51pm - misc - by valarmorgoolies (woman) - United States (New York)

Today, I witnessed a man masturbate into a public urinal, miss, fart, and then leave without washing his hands. FML

#21347895
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31230) - you deserved it (2289)

On 02/01/2015 at 6:10pm - health - by grossedout - United States (Virginia)

Today, my boss let me sit in on a board meeting. It was awesome until the guy next to me let out a vile fart, then looked at me in disgust, causing the others to look at me in disgust too. When I told my boss what really happened, he told me to grow up and stop blaming the other guy. FML

#21347235
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29263) - you deserved it (2390)

On 01/31/2015 at 10:08am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I let out a monstrous fart at the gym. They said it didn't even sound human. FML

#21341250
57 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27387) - you deserved it (6082)

On 01/20/2015 at 9:41pm - misc - by highschoolsucks - United States

Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend when I began dozing off. I was then awoken by an explosive fart. It was me. FML

#21340117
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29446) - you deserved it (5031)

On 01/19/2015 at 8:05am - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Nevada)

Today, I gambled on a fart and lost. FML

#21337828
67 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23544) - you deserved it (15087)

On 01/15/2015 at 8:08pm - health - by Anonymous - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I returned a rental car and almost got charged extra for the "funky and rotten" smell in the car. I blamed it on a sausage roll, not having the heart to tell the woman it was my fart from a minute before. FML

#21335609
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24667) - you deserved it (6731)

On 01/12/2015 at 4:46am - misc - by Anonymous - Denmark (Hovedstaden)

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend. Trying to be romantic, I complimented her on how nice her hair smelled. She replied: "Yeah? Wait till you smell this." then let out the vilest, most nauseating fart I'd ever smelled in my life. FML

#21330185
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35347) - you deserved it (6658)

On 01/03/2015 at 7:23pm - love - by allgassedout (man) - United States (California)

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend for the first time in over a month. When I came, I thrust one last time and let out a huge fart. She couldn't keep her mouth shut about it, and now all our friends keep calling me "CumFart". FML

#21329462
90 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34025) - you deserved it (6798)

On 01/02/2015 at 4:53pm - intimacy - by I'll Make You FartCum (man) - United States (California)

Today, my grandpa came into my room and asked for a pen. As I gave it to him, he let rip the foulest fart I've ever smelled in my life, and walked out without a word. 2 hours later, the smell is not only still there, it's filled the room. Looks like I'm sleeping downstairs on the couch tonight. FML

#21304373
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28482) - you deserved it (2530)

On 11/23/2014 at 7:52am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United Kingdom

Today, I woke myself up by letting out a long fart. It wouldn't have been so bad if I hadn't fallen asleep while on jury duty. FML

#21299443
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29678) - you deserved it (8037)

On 11/15/2014 at 8:25am - misc - by That_Indian_Guy (man) - United States (Florida)



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