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FML with : shower

Number of results : 373

Today, I found out my son likes to pee in the shower. He stated, "It's okay because dad pees in the sink!" I'm living with a bunch of bears. FML

#21363816
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13734) - you deserved it (1860)

On 02/26/2015 at 6:24am - kids - by showerlover (woman) - Canada (Ontario)

Today, I got out of the shower and walked into my living room to see my sis' and her boyfriend sitting very closely on our family's fairly large couch. I laughed and said, "Look at the happy couple." Then her now ex-boyfriend burst into tears. Turns out they'd just broken up. FML

#21345785
62 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28470) - you deserved it (3792)

On 01/28/2015 at 7:59pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Mississippi)

Today, I witnessed my husband in the shower singing Chicago's "You're the Inspiration" to his penis while manscaping. I guess that's a bond we'll never have. FML

#21342844
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26478) - you deserved it (3203)

On 01/23/2015 at 11:46am - intimacy - by LD - United States (Idaho)

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

#21328812
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24878) - you deserved it (6674)

On 01/01/2015 at 6:02pm - misc - by CK95 - United States

Today, I took a late-night shower. When I got out afterwards, the bathroom door was ajar, and I could have sworn I heard the faint patter of footsteps in the kitchen. "It's probably the cat," I told myself. Then I went upstairs and saw my cat asleep on my bed. FML

#21320813
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31677) - you deserved it (2408)

On 12/20/2014 at 9:41am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I popped into the shower hoping to come out all warm and clean. Something was very wrong with the pipes, and I came out smelling like sewage instead. FML

#21315541
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27563) - you deserved it (2555)

On 12/11/2014 at 11:09am - misc - by ohray - Turkey (Ankara)

Today, my girlfriend of two years broke up with me because of the scratch marks on my back. I didn't have the nerve to tell her I tried to shower with the cat. FML

#21300928
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19103) - you deserved it (30692)

On 11/17/2014 at 7:56pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Indiana)

Today, I was in the middle of a shower, and downstairs I heard my 7 year old daughter screaming "Mom!! Help! I need you right now!" I panicked and ran downstairs, not giving myself enough time to put some clothing on. It was my neighbor at the door. FML

#21293802
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33194) - you deserved it (3204)

On 11/06/2014 at 11:29pm - kids - by ozozl - United States (Colorado)

Today, after my shower, I went to clear off my fogged-up mirror. Doing so, I noticed a handprint on it. I compared it to my hand, but it was much too small. I live alone. FML

#21292770
142 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36407) - you deserved it (2421)

On 11/05/2014 at 3:44pm - misc - by spooked - Australia (New South Wales)

Today, I came to the conclusion I have three kids instead of two, after having to force my husband to take a shower. It's been a week. FML

#21288837
56 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28070) - you deserved it (2802)

On 10/31/2014 at 1:10am - health - by NoScrubs - United States (California)

Today, I had to inform my roommate that dry shampoo, deodorant, and perfume are not the same as a shower. It's been two weeks. FML

#21263853
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35452) - you deserved it (2471)

On 09/23/2014 at 2:30pm - health - by catgiraffegirl (woman) - United States

Today, I got up at 4.30am, like I do every morning, and got ready for work. Just as I was about to walk out the door, my flatmate jumped me and beat the snot out of me thinking I was a burglar. Because apparently burglars shower, make toast and clean up before stealing all your shit. FML

#21259933
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39851) - you deserved it (2532)

On 09/17/2014 at 8:18am - misc - by makeyourselfathome (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I overcame my debilitating seasickness long enough to have a shower and take a breath of fresh air on the cruise ship balcony. Then as a reward, a passing seagull shat on my head. FML

#21255023
42 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32063) - you deserved it (2626)

On 09/09/2014 at 11:53am - health - by nomfuck - United States (Ohio)

Today, as I got out the shower, my mom walked in to give me a towel, then quickly covered her eyes and said, "Woah, I almost saw your penis. Good things it's ridiculously small." I had friends over, and I'm pretty sure I'll hear about this for at least the next month. FML

Today, while talking to my sister, I explained to her that the reason I hope I end up having a girl is I want my daughter to love me the way I "used" to love my own mother. I didn't mean to say it in the past tense. My sister told my mom. She's planning my baby shower. FML

#21229187
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33882) - you deserved it (5989)

On 08/04/2014 at 9:20am - love - by mother to be - United States



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