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FMLs submitted from Wisconsin

Today, I was watching The Omen with my father. A little bit into the movie my dad turned to me and said, "Wow, you really looked like that Damien kid when you were little." Apparently I strangely resemble the anti-christ, and I am a teenage girl. Thanks Dad. FML

#5373762
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31246) - you deserved it (4145)

On 09/20/2009 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, at work a little girl wanted a slushie. Instead of pushing the tab in, she lifted it up and broke the machine, spilling slushie all over the floor. I was the only one working, so I had to clean it all up. I spent the rest of my shift covered in red slushie and smelling like cherry. FML

#5265552
121 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29853) - you deserved it (4336)

On 09/15/2009 at 12:17am - work - by conley19 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I overheard mom talking about how my youngest sister was the only one who used the money from the insurance settlement from my dad's death responsibly. I was in my first semester of college when she cashed in mine for a vacation. I had to drop out. FML

Today, I met some of my boyfriend's family for the first time. His aunt said I was really cute, which made me happy. As we were leaving I said "Your aunt thought I was cute." His reply..."Yeah, well, my aunt's on drugs". FML

#5086042
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42611) - you deserved it (3787)

On 09/06/2009 at 5:33pm - love - by me (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my landlord asked to borrow my truck to move some furniture. When she returned it, I noticed she had filled the gas tank up. I thanked her for doing so, and she handed me the receipt and said "just add it to next month's rent". FML

#4974639
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41842) - you deserved it (3025)

On 09/01/2009 at 11:07am - money - by overdriven07 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I saw a fight so I went over to try and break it up. Someone thought I wanted to join in, so he gave me an unexpected whap in the happy sacks, and I also got a bloody nose for my troubles. FML

#4912143
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13481) - you deserved it (40582)

On 08/29/2009 at 6:58pm - misc - by deven (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had my first real date with my first serious boyfriend. I was nervous because from past experience. I learned my lips were a bit ticklish and I usually giggled a bit during kissing. Well, we started making out and I thought was I doing pretty good hiding my laughs. Until I wet myself. FML

#4819197
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44949) - you deserved it (9631)

On 08/25/2009 at 7:56pm - love - by RitaDahhlinnnng (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, as a joke, my friends and I decided to put me in a dress and makeup, to creep out a friend. I'm a guy. I'm not sure which is worse, the fact that I so willingly volunteered to wear the dress and the makeup, or the fact that I thought it was comfy and made me look slim. FML

#4402387
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11841) - you deserved it (49629)

On 08/09/2009 at 3:31am - misc - by twitch01 (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it was my mom's birthday, I planned to wish her a happy birthday as she woke up. I opened the door to her room only to see my dad dancing around in an American flag thong. Grimacing in pain I closed the door right away. Not only am I forever disturbed, but now my dad is asking me how he looks naked. FML

#4371069
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40476) - you deserved it (6324)

On 08/07/2009 at 9:34pm - misc - by scarredforlife (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I learned that the four girls who I assumed were my girlfriends' good friends and whom she was always talking about were actually characters from the television show, "Sex and the City." My girlfriend has fictional friends. FML

#3980523
134 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48270) - you deserved it (5746)

On 07/23/2009 at 3:16pm - love - by tubedout (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I tried to make my mom feel better about me leaving for camp for 2 weeks by saying I wish she would come too. She took me seriously and called the camp and is now a camp counselor there. The only problem is I lied about going to the camp, and I'm really going to my boyfriend's lake house. FML

#3957207
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16409) - you deserved it (75207)

On 07/22/2009 at 5:31pm - misc - by grounded4life (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I ran into my ex-boyfriend in town. We broke up a year ago because he "moved" to Florida. FML

#3910335
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46307) - you deserved it (4051)

On 07/20/2009 at 6:00pm - love - by dwellswithin (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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