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FMLs submitted from Wisconsin

Today, while having sex for our first time, my boyfriend decided to test out a theory he heard about, that conversation during sex makes it more enjoyable. His way of doing it? He looked me straight in the eye and asked "How 'bout them Brewers?" We're from Wisconsin. That's our local sports team. FML

#12037742
145 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25469) - you deserved it (4300)

On 07/22/2010 at 1:52am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, my boyfriend bought a pogo stick. Now he rides it more than he rides me. FML

#11817765
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27473) - you deserved it (8980)

On 07/11/2010 at 9:35pm - intimacy - by RachelVanLannen9 (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was at the store when I saw two extremely hot girls. I walked into their aisle and they looked at me and smiled. I stopped and pretended to look at something so I could listen to what they were saying. They started laughing and walked away. It turned out I was reading a box of tampons. FML

#11459455
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8872) - you deserved it (44004)

On 06/25/2010 at 8:29pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I learned that dirty talk does NOT get me off. My boyfriend and I were having sex and I said "I'm going to come" during the beginning of my orgasm. My orgasm immediately stopped right after I said that. I turned myself off. FML

#11271577
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29804) - you deserved it (13923)

On 06/17/2010 at 6:56pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I finally weighed myself after going on a strict diet of only fruits, vegetables, and coffee. I gained weight. FML

#11218356
320 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22089) - you deserved it (15462)

On 06/15/2010 at 3:31pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I had to clean my boyfriend's puke off of our bed. Last night he ditched me to go out partying, came home, threw up, and passed out. He thinks it's only fair I clean up today because he's "not feeling well". FML

#10553243
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21665) - you deserved it (3832)

On 05/15/2010 at 7:47pm - love - by ihatelaura (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I got bitten by my aunt's dog. My brother was holding the leash. He said he didn't pull the dog away from me because he didn't want to rip my shirt. Meanwhile, the dog was biting a penny-sized chunk out of my hip. FML

#10539728
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22742) - you deserved it (2235)

On 05/15/2010 at 1:09am - health - by bitten (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, it's the third anniversary of when I started looking for a new job. I'm still working at the job that made me want to get a new one and I haven't even had an interview for another one in almost two years. My Master's degree on the wall is looking more and more like a roll of toilet paper. FML

#8990477
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16774) - you deserved it (2380)

On 03/11/2010 at 1:45am - work - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I woke up on the floor after I fell asleep last night while counting my tips. The pennies stuck to my face and left large blue circles from the copper. The blue won't come off. I have my senior photos today. My appointment can't be rescheduled. FML

#8748241
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22019) - you deserved it (5592)

On 03/01/2010 at 2:15pm - misc - by uwbeautyqueen12 - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was arrested for DWI in my own apartment complex. I had to be released into the custody of a sober adult, but I wasn't allowed access to my phone to get any numbers. I only have a few memorized. So I was picked up from jail by my ex-girlfriend and her fiancé - my manager at work. FML

#8733568
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14346) - you deserved it (13283)

On 02/28/2010 at 10:46pm - misc - by Ben - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I sat a client down for his haircut. He pulled off his hat and his hair was dripping wet. I asked him if he had just washed it. He responded, "No, but isn't it a hot day out?" No, it's twenty degrees and overcast today. FML

#8336543
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23772) - you deserved it (2113)

On 02/16/2010 at 11:35am - work - by kennarama (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)

Today, I was checking the Facebook event page to see who is attending the party I am having this weekend, since my parents are going out of town. 1 person has confirmed. My mom. FML

#8052181
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8282) - you deserved it (32227)

On 02/09/2010 at 1:52pm - misc - by fbcaught (woman) - United States (Wisconsin)



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