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FMLs submitted from Western Australia

Today, I told my boyfriend that I'm bisexual. He dumped me because apparently now there is "too much competition". FML

#21081103
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (42919) - you deserved it (12773)

On 03/08/2014 at 4:23am - love - by biwhat (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I dyed my hair. And my forehead. And my ears. And my arms. And my hands. FML

Today, I got accused of trying to steal clothes because I was taking so long in the fitting rooms with only a couple of items. I got stuck in one of the shirts I was trying on. FML

Today, a woman screamed at me for five minutes, demanding to know how long I'd been having an affair with her husband. I explained for the second time that she'd dialed a wrong number. FML

#20861161
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38827) - you deserved it (2337)

On 08/31/2013 at 12:30am - misc - by Tag (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, someone on Facebook posted a really tiny picture that I couldn't read properly, so I responded, "What is this? A picture for ants?!" Turns out it was a commentary about rape, and now I look like an insensitive jackass. FML

#20849199
107 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38895) - you deserved it (12333)

On 08/22/2013 at 10:48am - misc - by Baustigt - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my girlfriend's dad pulled out the chocolate flavoured condom that went missing under the couch. FML

#20819772
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41193) - you deserved it (17980)

On 08/04/2013 at 1:36am - intimacy - by Anon - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I attended an elderly patient's funeral. He died of a heart attack after his daughter, as his carer, stopped all of his meds in favour of a half-cup of garlic a day. Apparently she'd "read an article" about the healing power of garlic, which trumped my 6-year degree. FML

#20804217
158 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48127) - you deserved it (2560)

On 07/26/2013 at 3:58am - health - by Saddoc (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, It was my fiancé's 21st birthday party. It ended with him too drunk to walk and wailing about how much he misses an ex girlfriend of his that he dumped 4 years ago. FML

#20753850
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44946) - you deserved it (4509)

On 06/29/2013 at 4:02am - love - by bubblegum92 - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I found out why my daughter eats so many sugary baked goods. According to her, when you bake things, all the sugar and calories are "released" and so you can't gain weight from it. It seems I raised a moron. FML

#20713749
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44266) - you deserved it (8699)

On 06/08/2013 at 3:01pm - kids - by Anonymous (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I helped an elderly woman carry her suitcase down a flight of stairs. When I got to the bottom, a man tackled me to the ground thinking I was stealing the woman's luggage. As I lay in pain, he ran up the stairs to return the suitcase and the poor woman had to carry it down on her own. FML

#20686906
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (53028) - you deserved it (2840)

On 05/26/2013 at 5:19am - misc - by gooddeedgonebad (woman) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my bag got stolen with all of my belongings at the beach. After being forced to ask strangers for money, I then travelled home on the train for an hour, wearing only a bikini. FML

#20670402
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48236) - you deserved it (4952)

On 05/18/2013 at 4:57am - misc - by Chelsea - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, my son had to help out at the local retirement home for his community service. He got in serious trouble and came whining to me about it after he tried threatening some of the residents into taking part in a Harlem Shake video. FML

#20623837
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40124) - you deserved it (5655)

On 04/26/2013 at 8:21pm - kids - by Shitty genes, no two ways about it. (man) - Australia (Western Australia)

Today, I woke to find my laptop and printer covered in what smells like pee. My boyfriend then confessed to me that he occasionally "sleep-pees". It's like sleepwalking, but where he urinates on random objects. FML

#20538947
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30823) - you deserved it (2439)

On 03/11/2013 at 12:09am - misc - by marcymoo - Australia (Western Australia)



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