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FMLs submitted from Washington

Today, while trying to give an immunization to a "special" 13-year-old, I got spit on, kicked, almost bitten, and had a chair thrown at me. When it was all over, I flinched when the patient tried to hug me. Her mom called me a "b*tch" and I later found out she wasn't a "special" child. FML

#12767492
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33076) - you deserved it (3287)

On 08/27/2010 at 2:49am - work - by atetoeate (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I saw two cute girls walking my way as I was parking my car. Trying to impress them, I got out and attempted to coolly walk to the sidewalk. I tripped on the curb, scraped both my knees, and was laughed at all the way until I got back inside my car. FML

#12724664
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10944) - you deserved it (31300)

On 08/24/2010 at 6:36pm - love - by iammike (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me, right after I turned down an amazing job opportunity in another location, just so I could be with him. FML

#12547774
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28503) - you deserved it (14407)

On 08/15/2010 at 10:15pm - love - by crystalpistol (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my boyfriend finally got a job. As a clown. FML

#12304644
161 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28128) - you deserved it (8062)

On 08/04/2010 at 4:28am - work - by Ploeboi (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I found out I'm the only one in my family to wash their hands after they use the bathroom. FML

#11804292
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35313) - you deserved it (3316)

On 07/11/2010 at 2:06am - health - by Cheyenne - United States (Washington)

Today, my math teacher told me to learn how to say "welcome to wal-mart". FML

#11283515
179 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35136) - you deserved it (10538)

On 06/18/2010 at 3:13am - work - by Stevo - United States (Washington)

Today, while having sex with my boyfriend, my dad called my cell. He ended the phone call with, "and tell your boyfriend to shut up, I can hear him moaning." FML

#10696797
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14806) - you deserved it (41574)

On 05/22/2010 at 7:22pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, after racing home with a jumbo package of toilet paper, I ran into my house to go to the bathroom. I then realized I'd left the toilet paper in the car. FML

#10628533
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17272) - you deserved it (26653)

On 05/19/2010 at 2:42pm - misc - by phukt (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I lost my phone. I tried to call it using my husband's phone, but couldn't figure out which of the three Kates in the contact list was me. Turns out, two are co-workers and one is his aunt. I was listed under Satan. FML

#9110965
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40801) - you deserved it (8437)

On 03/15/2010 at 7:22pm - love - by Satan (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my roommate and I finally went to the DMV to transfer our vehicle ownership title to our names. On our way out, we joked that we were now responsible for any violations involving our car. We came back to a $35 parking ticket. FML

#9040800
77 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5933) - you deserved it (19048)

On 03/13/2010 at 4:17am - misc - by loki (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got food poisoning and have had the worst diarrhea ever. I laid down in bed, hoping to get some rest when my dad thought it'd be a good idea to sneak into my room and scare the shit out of me. Literally. FML

#8910408
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31807) - you deserved it (2204)

On 03/08/2010 at 12:34am - misc - by itsEVERYWHERE (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, at work, I had toast thrown at me by an old Vietnam vet. Who also happens to have a dead cat in his freezer. I love retirement homes. FML

#8902353
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19276) - you deserved it (2140)

On 03/07/2010 at 8:46pm - work - by liz (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my mom I was 3 months pregnant, expecting her to be happy. Instead, she screamed that I was no longer her daughter and she never wanted to see me again before throwing me out of her house, because I got pregnant out of wedlock. Nice math mom. I've been married for 5 months. FML

#8887792
189 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36998) - you deserved it (2403)

On 03/07/2010 at 5:27am - misc - by notamathematician (woman) - United States (Washington)



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