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FMLs submitted from Washington

Today, I'm getting over strep throat. The antibiotics they gave me make me have diarrhea unless I eat yogurt in between each pill. That wouldn't be so bad if I wasn't lactose-intolerant. Yogurt gives me really bad gas. So I have to choose between painful gas or diarrhea. FML

Today, I was on a walk when I ran into the woman whose kids I babysit. We had a quick chat, and I noticed she had just blown her driveway clean. As I left, I said "You did a nice blow job!" FML

#14481844
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20855) - you deserved it (11847)

On 01/06/2011 at 12:57am - intimacy - by babysitter (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my mother came over again to help me work on my Student Aid application. She also brought over the savings bonds that she has been accumulating since I was born to help pay for college. Turns out they won't reach maturity until I'm thirty. She never bothered to check out this fact. I'm screwed for college. FML

#14476476
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20875) - you deserved it (2790)

On 01/05/2011 at 5:52pm - money - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I found a note in my boyfriend's car from another girl telling him she hoped he liked the flowers. These were the same flowers he gave me while I was in the hospital, just after having his kid. FML

#14405039
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32601) - you deserved it (3627)

On 12/31/2010 at 2:43am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was wrapping Christmas presents for my family. I got a huge paper cut on the webbing of my fingers, the pain of which caused me to scream out loud. My whole family heard and came rushing to my room. My grandma took one look, and scoffed, "Oh suck it the f*ck up, princess." FML

#14330650
82 comments

I agree, your life sucks (10354) - you deserved it (24061)

On 12/25/2010 at 2:08am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I couldn't get into my car. In an attempt to get in, I broke a window. As I climbed in, the actual owner of the car walked up. Mine was across the street. FML

#14209327
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8913) - you deserved it (38834)

On 12/15/2010 at 12:48am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, at Arby's, there were two cute guys behind me in line. Right before ordering, my dad said loudly "Go get the calorie sheet. You need to lose more weight before you think about going after those guys." FML

#14186357
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27887) - you deserved it (3651)

On 12/13/2010 at 1:29am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was messing around on my laptop by drawing on the screen with a marker pen. When it came time to clean it off, it wouldn't budge. Now I have a full beard and mustache etched permanently on my computer screen. FML

#14179571
340 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5392) - you deserved it (102167)

On 12/12/2010 at 2:36pm - misc - by dumbass1991 (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, while parked at school, someone broke into my car by smashing the window. I called the police and they informed me I could drive it to the local station as it was an easy 2 minute drive. As I was driving there, I got pulled over for driving with a smashed window. FML

#14175206
52 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29463) - you deserved it (2019)

On 12/12/2010 at 2:17am - misc - by unfortunatelyunlucky (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a house delivering pizza. As I walked away, I heard the mom mutter to her child, "That's why you go to college." FML

#14162042
111 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22412) - you deserved it (4462)

On 12/11/2010 at 2:04am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I was in the middle of enjoying a really good book while in a waiting room. Someone saw what I was reading and thought it would be cool if she leaned over and told me everything that happens. FML

#14067824
83 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25633) - you deserved it (2490)

On 12/03/2010 at 2:02am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized I've been driving for almost two years and still get excited when I park between the lines on my first try. FML

#14017590
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15902) - you deserved it (16542)

On 11/28/2010 at 11:05pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friend peed her pants while we were sledding. I could feel it trickling down into my pants. FML

#14012574
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25404) - you deserved it (2375)

On 11/28/2010 at 3:03pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



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