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FMLs submitted from Washington

Today, after a long night of partying, I fell asleep, while my bride was delivering her vows. FML

#19761767
139 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6812) - you deserved it (54105)

On 06/09/2012 at 7:04pm - love - by UnluckyGroom (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, while waiting for a bus, someone started smoking at the bus shelter, which is illegal in my city. I politely asked him to stop smoking, citing the city ordinance. He just cackled and said that if I'm so concerned about the state of my health, I should start by losing 90 pounds. FML

#19749863
263 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17900) - you deserved it (34401)

On 06/07/2012 at 1:42pm - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, my friends were coming to pick me up from volleyball practice. When their car pulled up, I jumped in. It was really quiet, so I looked up, only to find I had gotten in the wrong car. FML

Today, I got a ticket for panhandling to get gas money so that I could both drive out to a job interview AND still have enough gas to pick up my dad. Apparently, these particular cops had nothing better to do than harass me for standing quietly next to a freeway entrance with a silly sign. FML

#19635056
187 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7851) - you deserved it (24320)

On 05/16/2012 at 11:42pm - money - by Starving Student - United States (Washington)

Today, I had to get a prostate exam. Right before the doctor started, he told me that if I found it awkward at all, I should just imagine I was being probed by aliens. FML

#19603388
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20656) - you deserved it (2026)

On 05/10/2012 at 5:22pm - health - by Jesse (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my fiancé and I appeared in the paper for obtaining our marriage license. In the same column half way down his parents appeared for filing their marriage dissolution petition. FML

#19571944
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17661) - you deserved it (1595)

On 05/04/2012 at 3:19am - love - by Queen_Dread - United States (Washington)

Today, I asked the girl I'm madly in love with out to dinner. When she asked me if I would pay, I jokingly said, "Well, that depends on how the date goes." She looked me up and down and said, "No thanks then." FML

#19549742
150 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19161) - you deserved it (13134)

On 04/29/2012 at 7:56pm - love - by -insert clever nickname here- - United States (Washington)

Today, I rear ended a cop while talking on my cell phone. FML

#19541631
254 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7239) - you deserved it (82444)

On 04/28/2012 at 10:31am - misc - by anon - United States (Washington)

Today, while I was in the midst of the most mind-blowing shower sex ever, the fire alarm went off. My girlfriend had left the stove top on and the entire kitchen had caught on fire. So instead of finishing, I frantically ran around naked trying to douse the flames. FML

#19484170
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27015) - you deserved it (3856)

On 04/17/2012 at 2:13pm - intimacy - by blocked_by_fire (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, my parents told me that I will grow up to be a criminal, living on the streets, on drugs. All this because I took the last chocolate egg. FML

#19443098
167 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27127) - you deserved it (4947)

On 04/10/2012 at 1:47pm - misc - by uhhh what? - United States (Washington)

Today, I actually used Febreze as a substitute for deodorant. FML

#19416021
118 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7991) - you deserved it (24001)

On 04/06/2012 at 3:24am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I realized that due to my obsession with House MD, I seem to have subconsciously developed a limp in my right leg. FML

#19400848
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7266) - you deserved it (25211)

On 04/03/2012 at 12:37pm - health - by spougeineye1 - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at the dentist. During my check-up, he recommended a dermatologist. FML

#19393124
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21211) - you deserved it (2585)

On 04/02/2012 at 1:59am - health - by bdogge99 - United States (Washington)



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