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FMLs submitted from Washington

Today, I had to explain to my boss that DVI ports are not the same as HDMI ports. When I showed him the HDMI cable, he said, "Oh! You mean USB!" He's an engineering manager. FML

#21445231
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23669) - you deserved it (1469)

On 07/21/2015 at 11:02pm - work - by geek (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I had 3 teeth pulled. Due to the anaesthesia, my mom came along to drive me home. Halfway through my surgery, she decided to leave and go shopping with her friend. She even left a note with the receptionist, saying that I needed to take on my own adult responsibilities. FML

#21439124
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27071) - you deserved it (1520)

On 07/09/2015 at 5:12pm - health - by gerbilmaster (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, I went to a restaurant and asked for vegetarian options. They told me, "We have a chicken Caesar salad, will that work?" FML

#21436862
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21496) - you deserved it (5927)

On 07/05/2015 at 3:20pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I was at a restaurant where the host is an attractive guy with only one arm. I was with my family, so I didn't want to be too obvious when checking him out. It seems like I was, though, because he came over and told me it was rude to stare at his arm. FML

#21436059
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23988) - you deserved it (3484)

On 07/03/2015 at 9:45pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, I told my parents I'm pregnant. I got a long lecture from my mom about using protection. It would have been fine hearing all that, but I'm turning 22, I've been moved out for a few years, have a full time job with great benefits, and am getting married next summer. FML

#21435425
51 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24520) - you deserved it (3824)

On 07/02/2015 at 3:16pm - misc - by I'm an adult! - United States (Washington)

Today, my cleavage got me out of a speeding ticket. That is, until the officer looked up long enough to realize I'm a guy. FML

#21433135
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24027) - you deserved it (4019)

On 06/28/2015 at 3:17am - misc - by fat and broke - United States (Washington)

Today, a cute guy asked me if I was single. When I said yes, he said "Yeah, you look like the type", and walked away. FML

#21428639
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26904) - you deserved it (2012)

On 06/19/2015 at 3:51pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Washington)

Today, my girlfriend made me put a blanket over my head while giving me a blowjob because she didn't like the faces I was making. FML

#21427104
124 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26606) - you deserved it (6037)

On 06/16/2015 at 4:01pm - intimacy - by bootyislife (man) - United States (Washington)

Today, after telling my mom that I'll be going to Las Vegas with my dad for my 21st birthday, she started ranting about how my dad always wanted to abort me and that she was the only one who actually wanted me. FML

#21421168
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26693) - you deserved it (1930)

On 06/05/2015 at 9:42am - misc - by Dig4life - United States (Washington)

Today, the phone lines at work have been cutting out in the middle of calls. I'm a receptionist at an animal hospital. I now have less than two minutes to figure out what's wrong with a client's pet and how best to schedule them before I become "That rude bitch who hung up on me." FML

#21419304
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25795) - you deserved it (1930)

On 06/01/2015 at 6:46pm - work - by thankyouforcalling (woman) - United States (Washington)

Today, I got hit on by an attractive young doctor. After talking for a while we realized that we recognized each other but couldn't figure out how. Then he remembered. He was the one who'd delivered my 10 1/2 lb baby 7 months ago. I stood out because my vag tore worse than anything he'd ever seen. FML

Today, my window broke and will not close. My room is in a wooded area. I've already chased out two squirrels and a bird and it's only been an hour. I'm afraid I'm gonna wake up like Snow White with all sorts of wildlife sleeping with me. FML

Today, a while after finishing and uploading a task, I looked at my peers' work to make sure I hadn't missed anything in mine. One of them had gotten the same idea and had decided to incorporate part of my work into his. "Part" as in "all". "All" as in all of his work is also all of mine. FML

#21409245
37 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25568) - you deserved it (2115)

On 05/12/2015 at 11:19pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Washington)



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