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FMLs submitted from Virginia

Today, I realized the senior thesis I turned in last week uses the word "asses" instead of "assess" 17 times. FML

#1423979
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20602) - you deserved it (57692)

On 04/28/2009 at 2:47pm - misc - by fuckspellcheck (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was at soccer practice. The ground's keeper just aerated the field, and my teammates and I decided to throw the cylindrical clumps of dirt at each other. I got hit in the face with one. It wasn't dirt. It was a clump of wet dog poop. FML

#1411450
46 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44825) - you deserved it (11712)

On 04/28/2009 at 12:35am - animals - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, while on a run off campus with my german shepherd, I tried to impress a couple of hot fraternity guys playing football outside of their house. I broke out into a full sprint. I then got tangled in my dog's leash and fell straight in to a parked jeep knocking myself unconscious. FML

#1408593
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14555) - you deserved it (52765)

On 04/27/2009 at 10:10pm - misc - by Radgirl (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, after driving a few hours late at night I decided to entertain the car tailgating me by not letting him pass. After doing this for 3miles, reaching 93MPH, I decided to let the car pass me. When I switched lanes, the car tailgating me light up in red and blue. It was a cop. FML

#1363713
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9918) - you deserved it (88057)

On 04/26/2009 at 5:50pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I met a really cute guy at work. He asked for my number, and I wrote it down on a piece of paper. After looking at the paper, he crumpled it up, yelled "Do you think I'm stupid? I know the rejection hotline when I see it", and walked away. It was my real phone number. FML

#1283810
131 comments

I agree, your life sucks (63218) - you deserved it (3430)

On 04/24/2009 at 4:18am - love - by sad (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I got a email from my boss. He said he was going to have to let me go for missing so much work over the last week. I was laid off two months ago. I don't know what is more depressing, getting fired from a job twice or the fact it took two months for them to notice I wasn't there anymore. FML

#1189537
59 comments

I agree, your life sucks (60681) - you deserved it (2992)

On 04/21/2009 at 11:11am - work - by laxguy23 (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my family and I ran into an older man my parents knew. He continually asked me questions like do you play football, have you started shaving yet, etc. I thought he was joking. He told my parents I had grown into quite a young man. I am a girl and he wasn't joking. FML

#1019315
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (69555) - you deserved it (4277)

On 04/16/2009 at 12:53pm - misc - by yellow_sunflowers101 (woman) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was with my girlfriend in her room. She starts screaming. Her father bursts in and, thinking I'm some kind of rapist, hits me in the head with a baseball bat. Not bad enough? I wasn't the one making her scream. There was a huge spider on the wall. FML

#927361
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (96462) - you deserved it (4567)

On 04/12/2009 at 2:11pm - animals - by spiderhater (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, my parents asked if I wanted to go to military school so i said "yeah that would be awesome," thinking it was a joke. They weren't joking. FML

#919776
36 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20544) - you deserved it (39075)

On 04/11/2009 at 10:44pm - misc - by AlienZ (man) - United States (Virginia)

Today, I was reminded that I used by dad's camera all summer to take naked pictures for boyfriend when my dad sent me an email saying: "FYI: when you delete pictures directly off the camera they get uploaded as trash files when the camera is connected to the computer." He saw them all. FML

#892613
132 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19215) - you deserved it (78211)

On 04/09/2009 at 9:15pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Virginia)



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