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FMLs submitted from Victoria

Today, I got a $20 tip from an old lady I delivered pizza to. Ecstatic, I walked back to my car where there was a $30 parking fine waiting for me. FML

#19692840
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17565) - you deserved it (7122)

On 05/28/2012 at 9:55am - money - by dammit33 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while I was waiting to pull out of a parking space, my boyfriend decided it would be funny to put the car into reverse instead of drive while I was waiting for traffic to clear. I don't think the people who own the car behind me were laughing. Nor is my now ex-boyfriend. FML

#19692417
163 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22467) - you deserved it (2738)

On 05/28/2012 at 5:38am - misc - by Broke (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my grandmother told me my favorite top had a permanent smell of BO, despite my constant deodorant use. I wear the top to work just about every shift. I now realize all the weird little comments my coworkers have made are actually hints to go take a shower. FML

#19677033
119 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6249) - you deserved it (20124)

On 05/25/2012 at 3:07am - work - by emliv12 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I faked my age to win a colouring competition. I just turned 19. FML

#19557146
149 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7148) - you deserved it (23024)

On 05/01/2012 at 4:24am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out why my girlfriend comes over for dinner so often. She thinks my dad is a real babe. FML

#19514086
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21807) - you deserved it (1683)

On 04/22/2012 at 10:43pm - love - by jack - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I tried to convince my daughter that the "To boldly go where no man has gone before" speech is from Star Trek, and is not an actual historical speech by the first man on the moon. She has decided to include it in her university essay on Neil Armstrong anyway. FML

Today, I realised that I only get dandruff when I'm stressed about having dandruff. Which is whenever I have dandruff. FML

#19400366
117 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16309) - you deserved it (3437)

On 04/03/2012 at 10:16am - health - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, things started to heat up in the bedroom. Not in a sexual way, though; the lamp caught fire. FML

#19349740
61 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22753) - you deserved it (2421)

On 03/26/2012 at 5:11am - intimacy - by pmek - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was babysitting this 12 year old. We were watching a movie, and he was being an angel just laying with his head in my lap. He fell asleep so I closed my eyes and had a little nap. When I woke up he had taken my shirt off and was feeling up my boobs. FML

#19343662
370 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36619) - you deserved it (11380)

On 03/25/2012 at 8:09am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I realised my period was two weeks late and panicked about being pregnant due to missing a pill a few weeks ago. Then I remembered I haven't had sex in almost a year. FML

#19293533
178 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32070) - you deserved it (9000)

On 03/17/2012 at 11:52am - intimacy - by noneedtostress - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my friend told me how she crept out last night to hook up with her boyfriend. At one point, she said she "snack" out, so I corrected her by saying it's "snuck". My boyfriend snorted, showed us in a dictionary that it's actually "sneaked" and called us "fucking idiots". FML

#19204484
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7527) - you deserved it (25875)

On 03/02/2012 at 7:14pm - misc - by argh (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was very cold and tired, so I took a shower to warm up and went to bed. The minute I hopped into bed, it collapsed and broke. I have spent half-an-hour rearranging furniture to get the mattress on to the floor. Now I'm cold again. FML

#19173617
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19018) - you deserved it (2703)

On 02/27/2012 at 7:36am - misc - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend sang "happy birthday" to my vagina. It was my birthday last month and he forgot, but he remembered the date of the first time he went down on me. FML

#19113419
136 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28226) - you deserved it (3945)

On 02/19/2012 at 6:37am - intimacy - by me - Australia (Victoria)



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