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FMLs submitted from Victoria

Today, my boyfriend and I were getting a bit steamy. After a few minutes, he jumps up and runs over to the closet and puts on a long brown jacket putting the hood over to his eyes. He looks me in the eyes and says 'I am Obi Wan Kenobi and I'm going to slay you with my light saber'. FML

#4223881
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50224) - you deserved it (9521)

On 08/02/2009 at 3:17am - misc - by dam01 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I decided I was going to dump my needy girlfriend. I was about to break the news when she stopped me. She showed me her new tattoo she had gotten. Our names, surrounded by a love heart spread across her back. She reckons I should get a matching one. FML

#4074077
246 comments

I agree, your life sucks (65050) - you deserved it (7757)

On 07/27/2009 at 4:12am - love - by DAMMit (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to the dentist to have two cavities filled. I hate the dentist. After he'd started drilling, I heard a "clunk" noise followed by an "Oops." My dentist had cut my tooth in half. Now I have to go to surgery to have the tooth extracted. FML

#4020266
116 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48804) - you deserved it (2472)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:21am - health - by Toothy. (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I came home to find my dad crying. Turns out my parents are getting divorced because my mom had an affair. With a teacher at my school. A female teacher. And the school isn't going to fire her because she's a good teacher. Every day at school I'm going to have to see her. FML

#3949695
264 comments

I agree, your life sucks (72448) - you deserved it (3499)

On 07/22/2009 at 6:43am - love - by mylifereallyISeffed (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I met with an important client to talk about his stake in the company. The guy was at least 80 years old. After taking care of business we spoke about my final year at the company. As he got up to leave he said "Good luck in your final year". Without thinking, I replied "You too". FML

#3899381
65 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32775) - you deserved it (13962)

On 07/20/2009 at 3:13am - work - by moutz (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, while working at McDonald's a car full of obnoxious teens came through. They had made a $30 order, and handed me a tin of small change, claiming that on a McDonald's ad they saw that we, employees, liked counting change. I had to count out $30 in spare change during a rush period at work. FML

#3659409
166 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50717) - you deserved it (4385)

On 07/11/2009 at 2:28am - work - by Meow (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my girlfriend left me. The reason? She's not actually a lesbian. She has been using our relationship to piss off her conservative parents. We've been together for over a year, and I've been in love with her for over five. FML

#3437520
227 comments

I agree, your life sucks (66870) - you deserved it (7928)

On 07/02/2009 at 9:33pm - love - by heart-broken (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I planned a romantic dinner with rose petals, the whole lot, for my ex-girlfriend to win her back. When I took her to my house I told her to guess what I had planned, to which she replied "I hope it's not a stupid romantic dinner with rose petals and shit." FML

#3331987
125 comments

I agree, your life sucks (50466) - you deserved it (13060)

On 06/29/2009 at 2:31am - love - by ipopnlok (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I ran into an old student of mine at the grocery store. She didn't recognize me at first so I introduced myself as her old teacher. She looked taken aback for a moment, and then said, "Oh my God... you're still alive?" FML

#3141332
76 comments

I agree, your life sucks (52936) - you deserved it (3957)

On 06/23/2009 at 7:31am - misc - by feelinblue (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I had a job interview but couldn't find my car keys. I had searched the entire apartment and had missed the interview. Turns out they were in my pocket the entire time. FML

#2989467
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14203) - you deserved it (49065)

On 06/18/2009 at 6:37am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 mins. I stayed in there even though I finished shitting after 5 mins, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

#2937594
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32019) - you deserved it (4218)

On 06/16/2009 at 10:59am - work - by yuen (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I accidentally left my concession card in the photocopier. I then got fined for not having a concession card on the train. I was photocopying it for a letter to get out of a fine for not having a concession card. FML

#2881369
66 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13254) - you deserved it (37390)

On 06/14/2009 at 9:16am - money - by LordAdam (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was peeing in the shower when my girlfriend suddenly pulled open the shower curtain in an attempt to scare me. Startled, I quickly spun around and peed all over her dress. FML

#2881104
366 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29682) - you deserved it (53447)

On 06/14/2009 at 8:46am - misc - by locksmack (man) - Australia (Victoria)



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