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FMLs submitted from Victoria

Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML

#14750549
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32340) - you deserved it (3932)

On 01/28/2011 at 11:10pm - health - by Mervin22 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML

#14671096
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38230) - you deserved it (3178)

On 01/22/2011 at 5:03am - intimacy - by Theaccident (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

#14647585
103 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31854) - you deserved it (11063)

On 01/20/2011 at 4:39am - intimacy - by saddened97 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, an old man started telling me about the high price of meat. I told him I wouldn't know, since I'm a vegetarian. His reply was, "Oh, most vegetarians are slimmer." FML

#14532668
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23537) - you deserved it (7929)

On 01/10/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally found out why my fish were dying in their tank. My younger sister had been spraying detergent in there because she wanted "to make the fish smell like lemons". FML

#14494919
49 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30303) - you deserved it (2588)

On 01/07/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by carrottop - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a New Year's party with my boyfriend. Later into the night, he got drunk, and left me there to go to another party with his friends. I have no car, and no way to get home. FML

#14417379
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22395) - you deserved it (3108)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:27am - misc - by Alana - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML

#14317962
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27330) - you deserved it (10669)

On 12/24/2010 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boss quit his job and stopped coming in without warning. Guess who just inherited his tasks and responsibilities without the training or pay associated with his manager role. I was hired last year as a junior system admin. FML

#14267236
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22136) - you deserved it (2660)

On 12/20/2010 at 12:29am - work - by promoted (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I took out my ear cartilage piercing. With my comb. FML

#14233403
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26603) - you deserved it (9127)

On 12/17/2010 at 8:13am - health - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was lying in bed listening to my neighbors have loud, and what sounded like, enjoyable sex. My boyfriend rolled over and said, "she sounds like fun" before rolling back over and going to sleep. It's been four months. FML

#14021574
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26744) - you deserved it (5799)

On 11/29/2010 at 7:13am - intimacy - by unsatisfied - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend confessed that he felt so insecure he submerged my $80 vibrator in water to eliminate the competition. FML

#13994749
156 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29208) - you deserved it (14096)

On 11/27/2010 at 12:57am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my boyfriend and I had a picnic on the beach. It was so romantic and perfect. He leant forward to kiss me. Once we had kissed he said, "We haven't even started eating yet", and passed me a mint. FML

#13822248
54 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22721) - you deserved it (8549)

On 11/13/2010 at 12:12am - love - by baconbreath=| - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I discovered I am the "before picture" in an internet weight loss advert. FML

#13766366
174 comments

I agree, your life sucks (41240) - you deserved it (8152)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:11pm - misc - by beforegirl (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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