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FMLs submitted from Victoria

Today, I had my friends help me put on a suit of full plate armor for a medieval re-enactment. After the battle, my friends left. I can't get the armor off by myself and will probably have to sleep in it. FML

#15136190
101 comments

I agree, your life sucks (21629) - you deserved it (8626)

On 02/27/2011 at 5:10am - misc - by hurley (man) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I have a condition that, when I pull my foreskin back, it looks as if a rubber band has been put on it. The doctor told me the only way to fix it was to have me circumcised. My mum laughed, then asked him if he had a magnifying lens to do it. FML

#15000318
85 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35084) - you deserved it (4155)

On 02/16/2011 at 7:54am - intimacy - by Anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my Dad thought "Joseph" and "Francis" were two people hacking our internet. They are actually the names of my laptop and iPod, which have now been blocked from using our modem. He can't figure out how to unblock them. FML

#14932841
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13173) - you deserved it (17673)

On 02/11/2011 at 5:59am - misc - by Gem (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was walking to the shops when I saw my friend about 10 metres in front of me, waiting at the traffic lights, by herself. Jokingly, I shouted out "Who's that really ugly person waiting at the lights?" The girl turned around. It wasn't my friend. FML

#14879534
50 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9141) - you deserved it (37952)

On 02/07/2011 at 6:43am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I found out about my parent's divorce over Facebook. FML

#14851025
54 comments

Today, my mother walked in on me and my boyfriend having sex. Afterwards, she informed me I would look a lot hotter if I smiled more. FML

#14755062
128 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29018) - you deserved it (7938)

On 01/29/2011 at 7:41am - intimacy - by anonymous - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I broke my arm. When I got home from the doctors with my cast, I fell asleep on the couch from the medicine. When I woke up, there were swastikas, "I love the KKK", and multiple penises written all over my cast. My dad thought it would be funny. FML

#14750549
222 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30435) - you deserved it (3757)

On 01/28/2011 at 11:10pm - health - by Mervin22 - Australia (Victoria)

Today, my mum told me how I was only here because my dad couldn't pull out in time. FML

#14671096
94 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35901) - you deserved it (2968)

On 01/22/2011 at 5:03am - intimacy - by Theaccident (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend and he was fingering me. After he left, my mum says to me "I wish my sex life was as interesting as yours." She had walked in and we hadn't even noticed. FML

#14647585
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26289) - you deserved it (8826)

On 01/20/2011 at 4:39am - intimacy - by saddened97 (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, an old man started telling me about the high price of meat. I told him I wouldn't know, since I'm a vegetarian. His reply was, "Oh, most vegetarians are slimmer." FML

#14532668
73 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19940) - you deserved it (7204)

On 01/10/2011 at 12:16pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I finally found out why my fish were dying in their tank. My younger sister had been spraying detergent in there because she wanted "to make the fish smell like lemons". FML

#14494919
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25710) - you deserved it (1976)

On 01/07/2011 at 7:12am - kids - by carrottop - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I went to a New Year's party with my boyfriend. Later into the night, he got drunk, and left me there to go to another party with his friends. I have no car, and no way to get home. FML

#14417379
41 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17849) - you deserved it (2361)

On 01/01/2011 at 12:27am - misc - by Alana - Australia (Victoria)

Today, I helped out with makeup at my daughter's high school play. As one girl walked past, I told her that she'd smudged pink lipstick all up the side of her face. Turns out it was a birthmark. She cried in the dressing room for half an hour. FML

#14317962
91 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22306) - you deserved it (8505)

On 12/24/2010 at 12:02am - kids - by Anonymous (woman) - Australia (Victoria)



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