Today, I walked in on my son trying to carve a bong out of a watermelon. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35607) - you deserved it (6075)
On 05/11/2013 at 12:21pm - kids - by What the fuck, son? (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I found out that the tinsel on my Christmas tree is worth a couple of hundred euros per strand. Well, that's how much the two that were surgically removed from my cat have cost me. At least the cat's going to be fine. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11415) - you deserved it (9053)
On 12/21/2012 at 5:02am - animals - by I Like My Cat (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I was visiting my daughter, whose husband was still asleep at noon. I made a point of stomping around on the hardwood floor and speaking loudly to wake his lazy ass up. Turns out he's now working a 14-hour graveyard shift, and it has no negative effect on his shoe-throwing skills. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3753) - you deserved it (63131)
On 12/06/2012 at 2:23pm - misc - by mom (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I went to see my favorite band. It was all amazing and great until I decided to go crowd surfing. I was maybe too heavy because people jumped away instead of catching me. I fell right on my tailbone. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4993) - you deserved it (18262)
On 11/17/2012 at 8:56am - health - by lekijkerd - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, at a supermarket entrance, a seemingly drunk old lady said, "Sir?" as I passed by. I just ignored her and walked in. When I walked out with my groceries fifteen minutes later, several people were standing around her, calling for an ambulance. She'd passed out on the ground. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6627) - you deserved it (44452)
On 09/04/2012 at 1:26pm - misc - by Anonymous - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, while at work, I managed to scrape open the inside of my nose with my fingernail, drawing blood in the process. I had to quickly up an explanation for my scream that didn't go: "Well, I was scouting for boogers..." FML
I agree, your life sucks (4039) - you deserved it (12830)
On 05/12/2012 at 6:09pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, my boyfriend thought it was a good show of etiquette to answer a text message from his ex, while he was still inside me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22468) - you deserved it (2078)
On 05/04/2012 at 4:57pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I found out why my room-mates and I have been ill for the past week. Apparently a rodent climbed into our water cooker and died. I have been drinking tea and eating noodles that have been tainted by a corpse all this time. FML
I agree, your life sucks (36555) - you deserved it (3700)
On 01/11/2012 at 3:08pm - health - by hannaaaahr (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, while having sex, my girlfriend suddenly broke down and started crying. Apparently, when I'm horny, my face reminds her of her dead dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks (34339) - you deserved it (3527)
On 12/19/2011 at 1:43am - intimacy - by lovely (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, I caught three kids setting fire to a bush. After chasing them off, I parked my bike by a house and went to get water. After I'd put the fire out, I walked back to my bike just in time to see the kids running off with it. FML
I agree, your life sucks (22154) - you deserved it (3292)
On 11/07/2011 at 4:38am - misc - by Isoldael - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, at 7am, I was woken up by a telemarketer. He tried to sell me a bedroom set containing "a comfortable pillow and goose feather cover". I was working the graveyard shift and had only just gotten to sleep an hour earlier. FML
I agree, your life sucks (19188) - you deserved it (2078)
On 09/14/2011 at 2:50pm - work - by kareltje (man) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, my husband, who's a recovering alcoholic, and I are on holiday with our kids. He's decided he can have a few drinks because he deserves "a holiday too". He doesn't see why this should ruin ours. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20428) - you deserved it (1933)
On 08/29/2011 at 7:17am - misc - by happymum - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Today, my boyfriend wanted me to meet the girl he has been cheating on me with. He thinks it makes the cheating more understandable if I see how 'hot' she is. FML
I agree, your life sucks (52676) - you deserved it (4294)
On 07/18/2011 at 4:21pm - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - Netherlands (Utrecht)
Monday 20 May 2013
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