Today, I decided to look for the horrid stench coming from my bathroom. It turns out my roommate has been throwing away her used tampons in the "trashcan by the sink." That "trashcan" is my old antique vase. FML
I agree, your life sucks (17663) - you deserved it (1540)
On 09/18/2012 at 7:56am - misc - by raesos91 - United States (Texas)
Today, I came home from work to be given $1 by my mother. This normally would have been nice, had my mother not said, "I just sold that ugly old black and white picture frame you always leave lying around in your room." Which also would have been nice if that "frame" wasn't my Kindle. FML
I agree, your life sucks (28150) - you deserved it (1268)
On 09/12/2012 at 4:44am - money - by humorizer - United States (Texas)
Today, the girl I've secretly loved for years finally noticed me. That is, after I ran over her foot with my truck. FML
I agree, your life sucks (14096) - you deserved it (4367)
On 09/10/2012 at 12:26am - love - by Disappointed (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I got into an argument with my mom over her sexist, emotionally-abusive boyfriend. I told her that either he goes or I go. She called me a disrespectful bastard for not respecting my "new father." I'm now sitting outside a McDonald's with my suitcase, leeching their WiFi. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26376) - you deserved it (1651)
On 09/08/2012 at 1:27pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went out to a club, hoping to score. I'd read about a trick pickup artists use called "negging" and decided to try it out. As I finished complimenting a girl for being brave enough to have not made much of an effort with her makeup, she slammed her knee between my legs. FML
I agree, your life sucks (3045) - you deserved it (31510)
On 09/07/2012 at 8:26pm - misc - by scumbag i guess - United States (Texas)
Today, I decided to surprise my boyfriend with candles and a sexy outfit. When he came in, he insisted that we needed music to help set the mood. Thirty minutes later, he's still searching for a song. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18297) - you deserved it (1629)
On 09/02/2012 at 12:56pm - intimacy - by ImOverHere (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, my dad wants me to spray a wasp nest, because I'm the fittest family member and can run the fastest. The wasps are already angry, and I'm allergic to them. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18338) - you deserved it (1037)
On 09/01/2012 at 10:09am - health - by iliveintexas - United States (Texas)
Today, I had to force myself to take a dump at school, even though I have severe restroom anxiety and shyness. I had finally relaxed enough to go when the tornado drills went off mid-dump, and 46 students and teachers packed into the bathroom with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (27860) - you deserved it (1903)
On 08/30/2012 at 1:55am - misc - by DamnTornadoAlley - United States (Texas)
Today, my girlfriend found my list of women I've had sex with, complete with the ratings I'd given them. The list is in chronological order. She's not only not the highest rated, she's not last on the list. FML
I agree, your life sucks (6906) - you deserved it (109098)
On 08/16/2012 at 3:36pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, my boyfriend and I broke up. He now argues that he should keep the dog. We only dated for three months, and I've had the dog since I was ten. FML
I agree, your life sucks (26847) - you deserved it (1359)
On 08/14/2012 at 5:06am - love - by cclllc (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was walking up some stairs and heard a noise as if someone was following me. The faster I went, the louder the noise got. I was too scared to realize that it was just my thighs causing my jeans to chafe. FML
I agree, your life sucks (11472) - you deserved it (8324)
On 08/12/2012 at 12:34am - misc - by FlorenceD - United States (Texas)
Today, my new boss, the CEO's son, finally showed up for work, three days late and right after lunch break. His first order of business was to call a meeting and scream at everyone for not having a diet latte waiting for him on his desk. God help us all. FML
I agree, your life sucks (20346) - you deserved it (853)
On 08/10/2012 at 7:16pm - work - by SHIIIIITTTT (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML
I agree, your life sucks (12670) - you deserved it (15986)
On 08/09/2012 at 7:39am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Monday 17 June 2013
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