Submit your FML story

  • - Concept: An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick:
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Texas

Today, I got my son's phone bill (the phone I got him to call us from college). I found out he's been calling a phone sex hotline everyday. He hasn't called us once. FML

#9796070
97 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36556) - you deserved it (7946)

On 04/11/2010 at 2:34am - intimacy - by dannytriplet - United States (Texas)

Today, I finally realized that the only time my mother talks to me is when she needs money. FML

#9177889
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27850) - you deserved it (2792)

On 03/18/2010 at 1:18am - money - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend of more than two years told me in front of all of our friends that he'd trade me for some Playstation 3 games. I laughed it off because I thought he was kidding. He made it clear that he was serious. FML

#9153191
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32005) - you deserved it (4617)

On 03/17/2010 at 3:05am - love - by Girl (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found out that I will be spending my spring break alone because my family is going to France. I can't go with them nor go with any of my friends because I have to take care of the cat. FML

#9149422
130 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32883) - you deserved it (3661)

On 03/17/2010 at 12:18am - animals - by LG (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I realized my girlfriend has way more friends than I do. How did I realize this? She called me to tell me she was at the beach with her friends and how much fun she was having. I was playing WoW in my room, and my friends don't answer my texts. FML

#9122950
104 comments

I agree, your life sucks (12281) - you deserved it (23101)

On 03/16/2010 at 1:12am - misc - by LonelyBoy (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, the satellite radio at work went on the fritz, playing one song over and over. Management wouldn't turn it off, though, because then customers would miss out on all those upcoming-sale announcements that run intermittently. Meanwhile, I got to listen to "Footloose" for eight hours. FML

#9099724
140 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23951) - you deserved it (2086)

On 03/15/2010 at 9:33am - work - by PunchingKennyLoggins (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I woke up late for a very important presentation. I got dressed but forgot to wear a bra. During the presentation, I bent down to adjust a shoe strap. I rose to find that the thin straps of my blouse snapped and exposed my breasts. I gave a great presentation and a titty show. FML

#9095970
215 comments

I agree, your life sucks (13414) - you deserved it (30716)

On 03/15/2010 at 2:35am - work - by exposed (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered my mom had sold all of our summer clothes over the winter on eBay because we're short on cash. However, I am allowed to cut off the sleeves of all my long sleeve shirts and the legs off my jeans to stay cool in the summer. Nothing's more attractive than looking trashy, right? FML

#9047777
231 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26153) - you deserved it (2631)

On 03/13/2010 at 2:16pm - money - by Nicole (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my girlfriend got into a huge fight with her mom over the phone. After the fight, she looked ready to cry so I went over to comfort her. She went straight past me, and started confiding in her creepy, extremely expensive dolls instead. FML

#9030368
100 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25075) - you deserved it (2571)

On 03/12/2010 at 8:00pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered my step mom had thrown out my baby blanket because it was an "eyesore". It was an heirloom from my birth mother and the only thing I have left from her. FML

#9024995
371 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48984) - you deserved it (2025)

On 03/12/2010 at 3:53pm - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my mom told me she can't wait for me to turn eighteen so she can turn my room into a place for her to display all her antique glass dolls. FML

#8999294
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20241) - you deserved it (2084)

On 03/11/2010 at 4:07pm - misc - by heartless (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I met my boyfriend's extended family. His grandpa was apparently senile, as he kept calling me "Tilly" and asking me to dance. His relatives thought this hilarious and busted out the video camera. Later, I learned his grandpa is not senile at all - the family was playing a joke on me. FML

#8968601
108 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25177) - you deserved it (3651)

On 03/10/2010 at 9:54am - love - by NotTilly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend dumped me because apparently I don't appreciate how he's different from other guys. I only told him that showering once a month was not normal. FML

#8967212
208 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29461) - you deserved it (4130)

On 03/10/2010 at 7:12am - love - by dumped - United States (Texas)



FML's blog

  • FML on vacation #1: Getting there
  • A lot of people will spout off the tired old cliché that the destination isn't as important as the journey itself. Well, what if you're on your way to the Playboy Mansion then?…

Tuesday 22 July 2014

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: