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FMLs submitted from Texas

Today, while I was making love to my fiancé, his mom walked out of the hotel bathroom and sat in a chair less than two feet away from the bed. She made idle conversation with us for the next 15 minutes. My fiancé was still inside me the entire time. FML

#13990744
137 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32687) - you deserved it (7036)

On 11/26/2010 at 8:03pm - intimacy - by Interrupted - United States (Texas)

Today, I discovered my parents took me to a specialist when I was a baby because they thought I had a facial deformity. It turns out I'm just ugly. FML

#13990251
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33714) - you deserved it (2690)

On 11/26/2010 at 7:23pm - misc - by bleh (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, after weeks of my girlfriend telling me to be romantic, I decided to make a romantic bath for us, complete with oil bath beads. After we get ready to take the bath, she puts her hand in the water and says she won't get it because 'it feels slimy'. I enjoyed a romantic bath alone. FML

#13978523
92 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25932) - you deserved it (3460)

On 11/25/2010 at 7:55pm - love - by TheCrackerNinja - United States (Texas)

Today, I tried to get my license. To get that, I needed to show proof of school enrollment. I graduated early, so they told me to get a copy of my diploma. I went to school, and they told me that I would need a valid driver's license to access my diploma. FML

Today, I got an electric razor and a lesson from my dad on how to shave my mustache and chin. I also got my period. FML

#13906340
162 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37916) - you deserved it (3976)

On 11/20/2010 at 12:21am - misc - by Tasha84 - United States (Texas)

Today, I asked my boyfriend what celebrity I look like. He thought long and hard, then said "Sarah Jessica Parker." I gasped and told him that I find her extremely hideous. He replied "So do I." FML

#13879750
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30606) - you deserved it (7935)

On 11/17/2010 at 7:26pm - love - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, I changed my phone number because my old one belonged to a prostitute. My new one belongs to a debtor. FML

#13835312
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24709) - you deserved it (2552)

On 11/14/2010 at 12:43am - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend told me I was the only girl he'd ever text, call, or flirt with again. Later on he told two other girls exactly the same thing on Facebook, not realizing that everybody can read wall messages. FML

#13829290
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29349) - you deserved it (3226)

On 11/13/2010 at 4:45pm - love - by girlwithaprob (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I received a restraining order from a girl I have never met. FML

#13808592
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34235) - you deserved it (3236)

On 11/11/2010 at 10:55pm - misc - by Bob - United States (Texas)

Today, my family and I were watching Mulan, and I mentioned that I've always had a crush on Shang. After going into detail about how I would "marry his sexy voice" I decided to look up this mystery dream man. To my surprise he was played by Donny Osmond. I will never live this down. FML

#13807463
110 comments

I agree, your life sucks (7917) - you deserved it (22563)

On 11/11/2010 at 9:40pm - misc - by hot4donny (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my apartment building shut off our water for a short period of time because the pipes were being worked on. It was also the morning my dog had diarrhea on my cream carpet. Not only did I have to clean it up without water, I couldn't wash my hands afterward. FML

#13801774
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26937) - you deserved it (2986)

On 11/11/2010 at 1:02pm - animals - by jordanss - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss was watching taser pranks online, when he said he was going to "get me". We often take turns playing pranks on each other, and I was the last to prank him. Now I'm terrified to move or turn my back on anything other than a wall at work. FML

#13801647
64 comments

I agree, your life sucks (18112) - you deserved it (7827)

On 11/11/2010 at 12:46pm - work - by MrsKSB - United States (Texas)

Today, I complained to my boss about how my printer wasn't printing colored ink even though I had just installed a new cartridge yesterday. Upon investigation, she noted that I forgot to take off the protection sticker from the cartridge. Good job. FML

#13793318
44 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5409) - you deserved it (24947)

On 11/10/2010 at 7:26pm - work - by MrandMrsRendon20 - United States (Texas)



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