Today, I got extremely wasted and decided to take a shower with my boyfriend. What seemed like a good and sexy idea turned into us falling and getting wedged in the bathtub. FML
I agree, your life sucks (7030) - you deserved it (14963)
On 02/29/2012 at 12:41pm - intimacy - by cfaul001 - United States (Texas)
Today, I got my score back for the monolog I performed. I got points taken off for "seeming nervous." My character was supposed to be nervous. FML
I agree, your life sucks (23036) - you deserved it (1629)
On 02/28/2012 at 2:38pm - misc - by Jessica - United States (Texas)
Today, my grandma seemingly decided that it was a really nice day to put my cat in the dryer. FML
I agree, your life sucks (21674) - you deserved it (1515)
On 02/28/2012 at 7:46am - animals - by JeffeeBojangles - United States (Texas)
Today, I got so bored that I drew a face on my index finger, and made a video of me garrotting it with a string. I ended up rupturing a blood vessel, and had to think up a cover story for my girlfriend to explain my screaming. FML
I agree, your life sucks (4790) - you deserved it (17627)
On 02/25/2012 at 2:09pm - health - by Jared (man) - United States (Texas)
Today, I dolled myself up and hit the campus gym, hoping to leave with a cute boy's number. I left in a stretcher. FML
I agree, your life sucks (8521) - you deserved it (22751)
On 02/24/2012 at 6:01pm - health - by gabby - United States (Texas)
Today, I was sitting at the mall food court, and wearing a "Blink If You Want Me" shirt. A guy walked by, saw my shirt, and made a point of holding a staring contest with me before moving on. FML
I agree, your life sucks (9407) - you deserved it (31484)
On 02/22/2012 at 2:40pm - misc - by KittenNomNom - United States (Texas)
Today, my husband and I were about to have sex. As soon as I got on top, he started speaking in a robot voice, then demanded that I call him "the Fuckinator." FML
I agree, your life sucks (27062) - you deserved it (3680)
On 02/22/2012 at 12:42am - intimacy - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was talking to my grandpa while he was gardening outside. Suddenly I feel this hard, salty thing fly into my mouth and I spit it out. It turned out to be a beetle. My grandpa takes one look at the beetle and says, "Well, at least that poor bug finally got you to shut up." FML
I agree, your life sucks (17328) - you deserved it (4361)
On 02/20/2012 at 12:05am - misc - by vw (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, I was talking to my husband about a work colleague, whose boyfriend is always sending her flowers and fawning over her. I mentioned how I've never been treated like that. He glanced up from his video game and said, "Shit, Mel. Get a boob job then." FML
I agree, your life sucks (24173) - you deserved it (5728)
On 02/17/2012 at 9:04pm - love - by Mel Ancholy (woman) - United States (Texas)
Today, the couple with three noisy toddlers in the apartment above mine finally moved out. A couple with a non-stop crying newborn moved in. FML
I agree, your life sucks (18844) - you deserved it (2212)
On 02/16/2012 at 6:30pm - kids - by Username - United States (Texas)
Today, I met my brother for the first time in 20 years. Everything was going great, until he tried to make out with me. FML
I agree, your life sucks (35553) - you deserved it (1974)
On 02/16/2012 at 4:13pm - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, Target asked me if I would do the closing announcement. I've only been working there a little while, so excited I agreed. I told people, "The store is now closing, thank you for shopping at Walmart." FML
I agree, your life sucks (12835) - you deserved it (24591)
On 02/15/2012 at 9:03pm - work - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)
Today, as I was leaving for work, I discovered my neighbor had just passed away. I found out when I came across his body lying in my front yard. FML
I agree, your life sucks (24058) - you deserved it (1256)
On 02/15/2012 at 6:53pm - misc - by Jedi2500 (man) - United States (Texas)
Monday 20 May 2013
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