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Today while at the gym I noticd a creepy-looking guy watching me. When I got up from the equipment I noticd that he sniffd the seat. I didn't say anything the first time. After he did it the second time I askd him to stop. He bent down and sniffd it without breaking eye contact.
Today, I told usband it would be great to spend an evening wit a bottle of wine an a pile of blankets on te balcony of our cabin during te cruise!! He decided it would be great to ditc me an go out gambling!! fat FML
Yesterday.. . I was babysitting mah barely-pubescent cousins.. . an they startd talking about giving blowjobs to their ( boyfriends ) . When I got mad at them an told them they shouldn't be thinking of that stuff.. . they said I was just pissd 'cause I haven't gotten laid . FML
today I received a poorly-written letter from my asshole neighbor in which he threatened to "sew" me because my dog shat on his lawn again. I went over, asked if he needed some wool fir his sewing, and told him to stop being an idiot. Now he's apparently hiring a lawyer fir real. mega FML
Friday 27 March 2015