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FMLs submitted from Texas

Today, it's the last night before a concert. Today is also the day my brother pawned my clarinet for drug money. FML

#21315391
87 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30632) - you deserved it (2007)

On 12/11/2014 at 12:44am - money - by noshow (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, my work department set a new sales record, something not done in nearly 30 years. It's corporate policy to give a bonus to each worker responsible as a reward. Our manager decided our "bonuses" would be plastic medals from Dollar Tree. He didn't even buy enough for everybody. FML

#21311945
53 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31391) - you deserved it (2063)

On 12/05/2014 at 10:44am - work - by anon (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, my boss at my new call center job said he'd gotten complaints about me. Apparently I sound "too black" and it's "upsetting" some of our customers. I don't know what that even means, but my boss said I need to "tone it down or we're gonna have some problems". FML

#21310827
148 comments

I agree, your life sucks (35190) - you deserved it (3197)

On 12/03/2014 at 4:21pm - work - by WTF - United States (Texas)

Today, while walking home with my mom, some unoriginal cockshart in a passing car yelled at me: "Fuck her in the pussy!" It was a long, awkward walk home after that. FML

#21308349
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28762) - you deserved it (2483)

On 11/29/2014 at 8:38pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I had to explain to a customer that 50% off a $50 item did not make the item free. FML

#21307823
102 comments

I agree, your life sucks (37341) - you deserved it (2313)

On 11/28/2014 at 10:36pm - misc - by idiots - United States (Texas)

Today, my supervisor was watching a video of his son. I heard a voice in the background and asked if it was Elmo. It was his wife. FML

#21302177
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30590) - you deserved it (5037)

On 11/19/2014 at 3:56pm - work - by bookworm - United States (Texas)

Today, I told my mom that my boyfriend, who I've been living with for a year, and I were moving to another state at the end of the month. I told her in a restaurant, over lunch, where she then just got up and left me there without saying a word. FML

Today, a character in the video game I was playing called my character a slut. My boyfriend ripped the controller from my hands, shot him dead, then fired the rest of my ammo into his corpse while yelling "FUCK YOU, BUDDY!" Good to know I'm dating a total lunatic. FML

#21293465
155 comments

I agree, your life sucks (33354) - you deserved it (6448)

On 11/06/2014 at 3:15pm - love - by notsofriendly (woman) - United States (Texas)

Today, I found a $20 bill on the ground, so I decided to pick it up. It was actually attached to a string and was meant to be a prank by some kids. They failed miserably, so I took the money. They ran up to me and punched me in the balls for taking their cash. FML

#21290736
55 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32994) - you deserved it (6371)

On 11/02/2014 at 7:11pm - money - by ethawesome1125 - United States (Texas)

Today, my boyfriend and I went shopping for an engagement ring. We ended up breaking up in the process. FML

#21289613
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (39217) - you deserved it (6199)

On 11/01/2014 at 10:06am - love - by limegreengiraffe - United States (Texas)

Today, I got approached by a lady while eating at a fast-food restaurant who asked if I could spare five dollars. Confidently, I pulled out my wallet to show her that I had no cash, only to reveal a perfectly crisp five dollar bill that I had completely forgotten about. FML

#21284180
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (28618) - you deserved it (15122)

On 10/24/2014 at 1:02am - money - by Yeah (man) - United States (Texas)

Today, I got my graduation photos back. I'd sent them to a friend for touching up, but unfortunately we had a major argument recently. I guess that's why in the photos I've been photoshopped out and replaced with a goat. FML

#21283103
81 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31374) - you deserved it (6323)

On 10/22/2014 at 1:37pm - misc - by Anonymous - United States (Texas)

Today, it's the first birthday of the condom in my pocket. FML

#21276832
88 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38141) - you deserved it (7281)

On 10/13/2014 at 10:15am - intimacy - by badplacerightnow (man) - United States (Texas)



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