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FMLs submitted from Tennessee

Today, I have been awake so long I hallucinated a llama in my living room. I have a medical condition that keeps me from sleeping properly. I've run out of medication. I still see the llama. FML

#19482788
281 comments

I agree, your life sucks (31621) - you deserved it (2668)

On 04/17/2012 at 5:38am - health - by SeeingLlamas (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I met separately with the President and Chairman of the company regarding a product that I'm designing. Each ordered me to do the opposite of whatever the other instructed. FML

#19400552
95 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22461) - you deserved it (2122)

On 04/03/2012 at 11:10am - work - by beagle1 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that something's wrong when you have to go to a mental hospital for a family reunion. FML

#19367140
98 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24635) - you deserved it (1790)

On 03/28/2012 at 10:53pm - misc - by neverthesame - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

#19158359
157 comments

I agree, your life sucks (30489) - you deserved it (2512)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:33am - misc - by BadGuyLuck (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my parents dragged me along to a family soccer game. I got so bored watching a bunch of grown men practically buttfucking each other between kicking balls around the field, that I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later to an empty field and had to walk five miles back home. FML

#19157440
181 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16512) - you deserved it (28649)

On 02/24/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by so bored -__- (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I told my girlfriend of two years that I love her. She replied, "Um, I don't mean to be rude, but can you just shut up?" FML

#19156004
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (32074) - you deserved it (3444)

On 02/24/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by music man (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out how it feels to get your nut-sack caught in a belt buckle. FML

#19152486
147 comments

I agree, your life sucks (26858) - you deserved it (5270)

On 02/24/2012 at 7:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML

#19122021
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (20902) - you deserved it (6762)

On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382
126 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8703) - you deserved it (26036)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML

#18924475
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (9114) - you deserved it (23116)

On 01/27/2012 at 11:30am - misc - by maryfaithh (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML

#18769573
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25302) - you deserved it (2413)

On 01/10/2012 at 8:40pm - work - by lions214 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (34279) - you deserved it (3236)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got married. About five minutes after I got my huge wedding dress on, I had to pee. It took three people to help me not pee on my dress, and my bridesmaids took pictures. FML



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