Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
Your nick :
Categories :
Man or woman?

FMLs submitted from Tennessee

Today, I got asked out for the second time in my life. Since my first date didn't go so well I thought I might have better luck with a different guy. I had to end the date when he confessed it was his destiny to kill his father. FML

#19158359
154 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24476) - you deserved it (1680)

On 02/25/2012 at 1:33am - misc - by BadGuyLuck (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my parents dragged me along to a family soccer game. I got so bored watching a bunch of grown men practically buttfucking each other between kicking balls around the field, that I fell asleep. I woke up a few hours later to an empty field and had to walk five miles back home. FML

#19157440
182 comments

I agree, your life sucks (11789) - you deserved it (18972)

On 02/24/2012 at 11:18pm - misc - by so bored -__- (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I told my girlfriend of two years that I love her. She replied, "Um, I don't mean to be rude, but can you just shut up?" FML

#19156004
141 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24526) - you deserved it (2392)

On 02/24/2012 at 7:50pm - love - by music man (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out how it feels to get your nut-sack caught in a belt buckle. FML

#19152486
144 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19083) - you deserved it (3579)

On 02/24/2012 at 7:30am - intimacy - by Anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I couldn’t have a conversation with my fiancé unless it was about Dragon Ball Z. FML

#19122021
194 comments

I agree, your life sucks (16182) - you deserved it (5030)

On 02/20/2012 at 10:53am - love - by DBZ (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382
127 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6321) - you deserved it (16568)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML

#18924475
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (6377) - you deserved it (13983)

On 01/27/2012 at 11:30am - misc - by maryfaithh (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML

#18769573
113 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19789) - you deserved it (1706)

On 01/10/2012 at 8:40pm - work - by lions214 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439
112 comments

I agree, your life sucks (27758) - you deserved it (406)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got married. About five minutes after I got my huge wedding dress on, I had to pee. It took three people to help me not pee on my dress, and my bridesmaids took pictures. FML

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML

#18135493
96 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24412) - you deserved it (10608)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:32am - intimacy - by ugadawgs09 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML

#17906392
106 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23099) - you deserved it (1979)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:14pm - love - by Nickolas Neffster - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (19185) - you deserved it (3105)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)



Allison Myres Perry & Jim Perry 's illustrated FML

Artist's interview

All illustrated FMLs

FML's blog

  • FML’s Roommates from hell
  • If we could, we’d probably all live on our own. Exotic dancers would do our cleaning and housework; bartenders would serve us glamorous cocktails with mini paper umbrellas in them every hour on the dot. We would…

Monday 20 May 2013

The whole blog

FMyLife, world tour

Available on: