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FMLs submitted from Tennessee

Today, I was playing Ultimate Frisbee and trying to make new friends since I'm new at my college. I was running after an overthrown frisbee for a touchdown. Everyone cheered me on to keep going. I ran full speed into a fence. FML

#4781635
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29087) - you deserved it (8316)

On 08/24/2009 at 10:22am - health - by AvengdSevenfold (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I spent my date night babysitting. After waiting three hours later than I was supposed, the mother finally gets home at 11, too late for me to get out and have any fun. Already annoyed, I take the money as she says, "I hope this is enough, I got hungry and spent some of your money." FML

#4020289
99 comments

I agree, your life sucks (46689) - you deserved it (2687)

On 07/25/2009 at 12:21am - work - by hugs511 (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was talking to my good friend's girlfriend. She mentioned being afraid of losing her job. Because she was still a teenager, I jokingly said, "oh, like you're responsible for a whole family." She is. FML

#3633751
58 comments

I agree, your life sucks (14063) - you deserved it (45826)

On 07/10/2009 at 4:20am - misc - by Mezzlegasm (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I turned 23. I had asked my mom for some things to decorate my new place. As I opened the box to reveal my gift, a mirror was inside. I liked the mirror. I did not like the note attached that said "Look inside the mirror to see who is now 100% financially responsible for themselves." FML

#3627514
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (36767) - you deserved it (17646)

On 07/10/2009 at 12:08am - money - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had sex with my fiancée. My panties fell behind the bed. Later, when I went to get them, I found three other pairs. Only one pair was mine. FML

#3574119
122 comments

I agree, your life sucks (68471) - you deserved it (3955)

On 07/08/2009 at 2:46am - intimacy - by cheated (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend called me explaining that he is getting married this weekend to a woman he met on Craigslist. Why? Because I won't marry him, and he'll make an extra thousand dollars per month having a wife since he is in the army. FML

#3462029
169 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40616) - you deserved it (10782)

On 07/03/2009 at 7:25pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend missed our date, so I text her angry, telling her if she can't make our dates then we should break up, and generally telling her off. 5 Minutes later I get a picture message of her sleeping in a hospital bed from her mother saying "Shut the **** up, she had appendicitis." FML

#3361176
312 comments

I agree, your life sucks (15587) - you deserved it (87199)

On 06/30/2009 at 7:20am - love - by annoyedguy (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my girlfriend was upset, so I tried to cheer her up by telling her how much I love her and how beautiful she is. After a minute, her face started to light up. I thought it had worked until I realized that she was being cheered up by the friends she was talking to online. FML

#3159457
48 comments

I agree, your life sucks (38283) - you deserved it (3283)

On 06/23/2009 at 10:50pm - love - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boss hired a feng shui consultant for our small office space. I am the only full-time employee besides the owners, and I work as an unpaid intern. My company would rather pay someone to rearrange my desk than pay me to work at it. FML

#3122883
78 comments

I agree, your life sucks (40861) - you deserved it (3865)

On 06/22/2009 at 4:06pm - work - by Goldo (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, we spread my uncle's ashes at my grandparent's house. We were on a hill overlooking a sunset. It was a beautiful ceremony... until the winds changed direction. Our whole family wound up covered in my Uncle. He's still stuck in my hair. FML

#3078686
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (48698) - you deserved it (3581)

On 06/21/2009 at 12:23am - misc - by Lee (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I received an email from a temp agency trying to hire me. Suprisingly, it was the same job I was just laid off from after two years of great employment. They were trying to hire me at half my original salary. FML

#2792784
70 comments

I agree, your life sucks (49533) - you deserved it (2257)

On 06/11/2009 at 1:21am - work - by surfernerd6987 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my family and I were parking downtown when my sister yelled to watch out for a man approaching our car. I see him pull something from his pocket. I yell "It's a knife, don't roll down the window!" It was a pen, he was the parking attendant and the window was already rolled down. FML

#2787428
86 comments

I agree, your life sucks (8045) - you deserved it (42405)

On 06/10/2009 at 10:28pm - misc - by parkinglotslayer (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was playing paintball when I noticed a 9 year old fat kid sitting and crying on the ground. Thinking he'd fallen and was hurt, I walked over to him. He looks up and shoots me in the face, arm, stomach, and happy sacks area from 4 feet away then runs off. He was not hurt at all, and now everything tastes like paint. FML

#2734001
206 comments

I agree, your life sucks (44982) - you deserved it (7909)

On 06/09/2009 at 2:04am - misc - by Woody - United States (Tennessee)



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