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FMLs submitted from Tennessee

Today, I learned a little lesson about consequences. Yesterday, I ate a quarter as a dare. Today, I tried to poop it out. It got stuck coming out. I had to go to the doctor and explain everything. FML

#8519094
180 comments

I agree, your life sucks (5421) - you deserved it (42924)

On 02/21/2010 at 2:34pm - misc - by anna14 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I opened the freezer for some Poptarts and a giant block of meat fell and broke my toe. FML

#8248979
229 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23342) - you deserved it (6002)

On 02/14/2010 at 1:05pm - misc - by freakingow (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, while I was painting, my little nephew came in and started watching me. I left to clean my brushes. When I came back into the room, my nephew had spilled paint all over the carpet making a rainbow. It took me 5 hours to clean it up. FML

#8205251
79 comments

I agree, your life sucks (17926) - you deserved it (7199)

On 02/13/2010 at 12:32pm - kids - by ositsranielle - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was fired from my job. Why? Because my boss has been dating my newly divorced mother, and he didn't want family get-togethers to be "awkward." FML

#8177563
93 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25451) - you deserved it (1524)

On 02/12/2010 at 7:22pm - work - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I ran into a former college classmate at Subway. He gushed on and on about how I was the only one in our class with true potential. Then I asked him what kind of sandwich he wanted, because 3 years out of college, Subway is still the only place that will hire a music major. FML

#8125796
223 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25365) - you deserved it (6638)

On 02/11/2010 at 9:07am - work - by Prodigy (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I was working when an older lady came up to buy a coffee. Her son cried for a cup of whipped cream to snack on. She shook her head, silently telling me to say no. I said we were out. The mother took her drink and said, "I'm sorry honey, but the mean man said you couldn't have any." FML

#8069688
197 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29395) - you deserved it (3194)

On 02/09/2010 at 10:32pm - work - by nichaneely (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got called out of class to talk to some cops. Turns out my car was involved in a hit and run accident, while I was in school and there was no possible way it could have been me. But since they have no one else, it's my fault. FML

#8031380
80 comments

I agree, your life sucks (29806) - you deserved it (1831)

On 02/08/2010 at 10:29pm - misc - by sweeeeet (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I walked outside, slipped, busted my head, and had to get 7 stitches. Turns out my son thought it would be funny to spray the sidewalk with water last night so it would freeze. He got a laugh, and I spent over $100 on the stitches. FML

#7847949
133 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23722) - you deserved it (2461)

On 02/03/2010 at 3:04pm - misc - by Anonymous (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I slipped on my icy front porch, fell back and hit my head on the step. I tried to get up, but lost my balance and fell halfway into the bush next to the steps. I then looked up to see my very hot, British, Ex-Special Forces next door neighbor laughing so hard he dropped his snow shovel. FML

#7757731
75 comments

I agree, your life sucks (22702) - you deserved it (2811)

On 01/31/2010 at 9:12pm - misc - by youlyingjerk (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out a friend of mine likes me. It wasn't by a cute gesture like a sweet little note, or a beautiful heartfelt confession like you might expect. He sprang at my boyfriend and choked him (while I strained to pull him off). Right during the middle of our 60+ student populated class. FML

#7635822
84 comments

I agree, your life sucks (25645) - you deserved it (2579)

On 01/28/2010 at 3:09am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I had a completely improvised audition for the school play. The director called me and one of the cutest guys auditioning to improvise an intimate scene. Knowing that I'm a complete klutz, I wasn't all that surprised when I tripped over my feet and landed with my face in his crotch. He was. FML

#7582501
72 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23631) - you deserved it (3414)

On 01/26/2010 at 12:25am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got yelled at by one of my bosses. The reason? I was yawning. I work at Starbucks. Apparently I wasn't 'promoting' correctly. FML

#7467721
74 comments

I agree, your life sucks (23520) - you deserved it (4093)

On 01/21/2010 at 12:29am - work - by nichaneely (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, one of my employees lit my tie on fire. FML

#7430304
115 comments

I agree, your life sucks (24373) - you deserved it (5333)

On 01/19/2010 at 12:00am - work - by mcdman (man) - United States (Tennessee)



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