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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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FMLs submitted from Tennessee

Today, I realized that I probably have anger issues. I came to this conclusion after I finished screaming abuse at the microwave for beeping before I could hit the off switch. FML

#19058382 (66)

I agree, your life sucks (273) - you deserved it (864)

On 02/12/2012 at 4:50pm - misc - by fuck teh poleese (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I tried to open a can with a potato peeler. For a minute I forgot what a can opener looked like. FML

#18924475 (133)

I agree, your life sucks (2246) - you deserved it (5093)

On 01/27/2012 at 11:30am - misc - by maryfaithh (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, at work at a store, I was sitting on the floor stocking a bottom shelf. A woman in a motorized cart did not see me, and ran over my hand. When I alerted her about what she had done she laughed. FML

#18769573 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (7388) - you deserved it (648)

On 01/10/2012 at 8:40pm - work - by lions214 (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found Jesus. The bad news, he was in the form of a concrete statue falling on my car. FML

#18316439 (136)

I agree, your life sucks (24203) - you deserved it (2040)

On 11/22/2011 at 12:18pm - misc - by religionbites621 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I got married. About five minutes after I got my huge wedding dress on, I had to pee. It took three people to help me not pee on my dress, and my bridesmaids took pictures. FML

#18225730 (143)

I agree, your life sucks (7712) - you deserved it (3070)

On 11/12/2011 at 3:30am - love - by summinay - United States (Tennessee)

This FML has been commented on by its original poster.

Today, while I was having sex with my girlfriend, I heard a notification on my iPhone. I thought nothing of it until we were done, and then I checked it out. My mom had posted on my Facebook, telling me that if I didn't keep it down, she was going to come up to my room. FML

#18135493 (105)

I agree, your life sucks (20614) - you deserved it (7949)

On 11/02/2011 at 12:32am - intimacy - by ugadawgs09 - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I bought my girlfriend a very expensive necklace. I gave it to her thinking she'd be extremely happy. Instead she was mad at me because my gift for our anniversary was better than hers. FML

#17906392 (116)

I agree, your life sucks (21611) - you deserved it (1817)

On 10/04/2011 at 8:14pm - love - by Nickolas Neffster - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my daughter spoke her first words. Her dad had been practicing with her for weeks in secret. She crawled to me and said, "I poop." FML

#17761729 (84)

I agree, your life sucks (17684) - you deserved it (2906)

On 09/17/2011 at 12:36am - kids - by applesmama - United States (Tennessee)

Today, my boyfriend cheated on me. But he justified it by saying she was a ginger. FML

#17738914 (139)

I agree, your life sucks (10040) - you deserved it (1139)

On 09/13/2011 at 8:07pm - intimacy - by anonymous - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I apologized to the cat for walking into the laundry room while he was using the litter box. FML

#17734128 (134)

I agree, your life sucks (6819) - you deserved it (2789)

On 09/13/2011 at 2:05am - animals - by Anonymous (woman) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, a woman came into the gas station where I work, yelling because her credit card wouldn't read at the pump. I politely told her that I could set the pump up for a set amount, and she could swipe the card at the register. Her response: "You need Jesus." FML

#17727242 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (19246) - you deserved it (1446)

On 09/12/2011 at 10:28am - work - by charliemann_ - United States (Tennessee)

Today, I found out that the man who offered to put up the woman I love in exchange for me helping out with his rent, has in fact been her "other" boyfriend since before she moved in. FML

#17706301 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (15827) - you deserved it (2619)

On 09/09/2011 at 7:48pm - love - by Just me (man) - United States (Tennessee)

Today, after using the bar of soap in the shower to wash my face, I looked down and noticed it was covered in my husband's pubes. FML

#17620959 (249)

I agree, your life sucks (8112) - you deserved it (2722)

On 08/30/2011 at 12:48pm - intimacy - by Nasty (woman) - United States (Tennessee)