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Submit your FML story

  • - Concept : An anecdote always starts with Today and ends with FML. There are no taboo subjects, feel free to express yourself.
  • - CAUTION: Read your message over. Please don't use text language and avoid making too many spelling mistakes.
  • - Please note that spam and nonsensical stories will result in you being blocked from accessing FML.
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FMLs submitted from Stockholms Lan

Today, I lost my virginity. Afterwards, he told me that he was only doing this because he wanted to know if he still truly loves his girlfriend. FML

#18474670 (251)

I agree, your life sucks (34720) - you deserved it (7955)

On 12/10/2011 at 7:03am - intimacy - by Anonymousss95 - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I met an old friend, with whom I have a complicated history and we hooked up. He came before we even started. In his sleep, he pushed me out of the bed. When I woke up, he had peed himself in his sleep. Glad I let that ship sail. FML

#17959088 (101)

I agree, your life sucks (11313) - you deserved it (12853)

On 10/11/2011 at 10:51am - intimacy - by CC (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I was helping some friends put supplies in my crush's car for our picnic. His girlfriend cracked a joke about me, so I just sarcastically laughed and slammed the door shut. Now she has three broken fingers, and I have a reputation as a psychopath. FML

#17522033 (149)

I agree, your life sucks (20282) - you deserved it (5777)

On 08/19/2011 at 6:47pm - misc - by friendly_neighbourhood_psycho (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my father tricked me into eating a Tasmanian habanero, saying it was just another pepper. The burning in my mouth was unbearable, but nothing compared to when I took a shit later in the day. FML

#17450169 (193)

I agree, your life sucks (9523) - you deserved it (1282)

On 08/12/2011 at 1:25pm - misc - by Coldsnap - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I saw a girl on the subway that I knew so I started waving frantically. She gave me a really weird expression and moved quickly away from me. Then I realised that I only knew her because I had stalked her facebook once. FML

#14381626 (95)

I agree, your life sucks (5616) - you deserved it (33329)

On 12/29/2010 at 11:30am - misc - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my cute co-worker asked if he could use my computer. I told him my password and went to the bathroom. When I came back he said he'd finished. I tried to log in, but my password wouldn't work. I then noticed a post-it note on the desk saying, "Stop stalking me and I'll change the password back." FML

#13959673 (83)

I agree, your life sucks (6368) - you deserved it (23267)

On 11/24/2010 at 8:18am - work - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I freaked out when I couldn't get my bathroom door open. After ten minutes of panic when thinking about how I'd be stuck there for at least 8 hours until my roommate would get home, and another five mentally going over survival skills, I realized that I had forgotten to unlock the door. FML

#13766539 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (4869) - you deserved it (27520)

On 11/08/2010 at 4:26pm - misc - by pottyhostage (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, the guy I like called me, and my mom picked up. Just as it happened I slipped and fell in the shower and was sitting there moaning. The guy asked if he could speak to me, but my mom heard me and answered "Well, she is masturbating right now, but I'll tell her to call you later!". FML

#6998610 (81)

I agree, your life sucks (17050) - you deserved it (1684)

On 12/28/2009 at 7:48pm - intimacy - by notexactly (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my boyfriend gave me an early wedding present. I opened the box and inside was the most adorable cat I've ever seen! It got scared, jumped out, clawed my face and pissed everywhere. My wedding is tomorrow and I look like Frankenstein's bride. FML

#6366534 (122)

I agree, your life sucks (27200) - you deserved it (2262)

On 11/19/2009 at 8:36am - love - by Anonymous (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I read an incoming message in my wifes phone. "I miss your warm hands and mouth". The message came from a female co-worker of hers. FML

#4506160 (242)

I agree, your life sucks (39687) - you deserved it (4075)

On 08/13/2009 at 5:49pm - love - by rick (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I come home to find my nephew holding pieces of my new $3,500 Sony Video Camera. He told me he threw it out the window because it was a portal for aliens. FML

#3527232 (131)

I agree, your life sucks (40855) - you deserved it (2617)

On 07/06/2009 at 2:41pm - misc - by AidenFromSweden (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, my girlfriend who lives in China contacted me and told me she'd been harassed by a guy and was thinking about pressing charges. The guy is someone I know from college - he promised me he would say "hi" to her for me while he was in Shanghai. FML

#2339786 (138)

I agree, your life sucks (42823) - you deserved it (3384)

On 05/27/2009 at 12:18pm - love - by Anonymous (man) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)

Today, I turned 22, without anyone wishing me a happy birthday. In fact, the only phone call I received all day was from my brother. He wanted to borrow money. FML

#279813 (125)

I agree, your life sucks (95077) - you deserved it (4363)

On 03/12/2009 at 5:59am - misc - by Ondskansgris (woman) - Sweden (Stockholms Lan)